Bill Walton has effectively stopped calling basketball games. His tangential hippie lunacy has transcended the occasional side comment and completely eclipsed his job as a commentator. And we couldn't be more grateful.
Just a couple of weeks after rubbing dirt on himself on live TV—and encouraging his ever-patient straight man,commentator Dave Pasch, to do the same—Walton has gone and hijacked a UC Berkeley band member's glockenspiel and started playing it. Because why the hell not? The band member, happy to be sharing some screen time, obliges Bill Walton as he rattles some nonsense music on his glockenspiel and even knocks one of its bars lose.
"No I didn't break it; it comes apart like that," Walton says to Pasch. "That's how you transport it. So you can… please. Don't you know anything about glockenspiels?!"
Duh, Pasch. Do your goddamn German orchestral instrument homework for once, huh?
Walton goes on to question the animal on the young band member's hat. "That's not a bear. That's a beaver," Walton insists, despite the obvious fact that he's commenting on a Cal Bears game.
Perhaps the best moment of the broadcast ame when ESPN finally decided to finally split screen a shot of Walton wearing the "beaver hat" and the game at the same time.
Because that's honestly how all games should be broadcast—with a little Bill Walton in your corner, spouting out his genius inanities.