There are two major vices that are helping me cope with this terrible coronavirus crisis we're all dealing with right now: Playing an irresponsible amount of Call of Duty and getting absolutely blasted on some dry weed I should not be smoking during a respiratory pandemic.
Call of Duty's recently released Warzone mode has given me a healthy and productive place to virtually socialize with my friends, while smoking weed allows me to momentarily forget the world is falling apart, or to just be sort of cool about it. Incidentally, Call of Duty and weed have a long history together, with the first person shooter leaning into its bong-ripping audience by selling them weed-themed customization options, and partnering with weedfluencers like Snoop Dogg.
It is the height of hypocrisy then that Call of Duty: Modern Warfare will actively try and get me to spend real money on a weed color scheme for my gun, but attempt to silence me if I profess my love for smoking weed in the game.
At the moment, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare is offering the "Blunt Force" pack for 1100 CP, the game's premium currency which can be acquired laboriously by playing or by paying $10. It includes the P90 submachine gun adorned with weed leaves (cool as hell) and a variety of customization options, like an animated emblem of a weed leaf which appears to itself be smoking weed.
"Weed out your opponents with the Blunt Force Pack," the product copy reads.
I'm at a point where I'm regularly bored, playing Call of Duty, and high enough to spend money on this nonsense. I would love to, theoretically, buy the Blunt Force pack, and use the game's deep customization options to create a custom "loadout" I could name "Weed Killer" or something equally clever. Unfortunately, Call of Duty will block naming any loadout that includes the term weed "due to profanity."
I also can't start a regiment for my pothead friends and name it "Weed Likers Club." The game's profanity filter, which is turned on by default, will also censor any mention of weed in chat.
Call of Duty's profanity filter is pretty aggressive, and will censor words like "ass" even when they're included as part of the word "class."
That's probably for the best because in-game chat is vile in most online shooters, and it can also be turned off so you can have the freedom to say you love weed. However, you're still unable to use the term "weed" in your customization options or regiment name. Curiously, terms like cannabis, marijuana, and ganja are permitted.
We all know that many people who love to smoke weed love to play Call of Duty. Even Call of Duty's publisher Activision knows it because it's selling products catered to that audience. All things considered, it's probably good that one of the biggest games in the world is chill about what has historically been a tragically criminalized substance. All Activision has to do is take one last step and remove "weed" from the profanity filter so I can start a "Weed Lover's" regiment armed with "Weed Blasters."
Activision did not immediately respond to a request for comment.