Tim Hortons Trying to Save India from Tim Hortons Knockoff

If you happen to need a coffee only made drinkable by excessive amounts of cream and sugar while out in Yamunanagar, India there is only place to go—Tim Hottens.

Yup. As first reported by the Canadian Press, the restaurant, is essentially, a wholesale ripoff of the Canada’s iconic Tim Hortons. It has the similar name, obviously, but it also has a similar branding complete with the slogan and all. When the Canadian Press took this to Tim Hortons, they, obviously, were none too pleased.

“While we believe that imitation is often the sincerest form of flattery, we do have very high standards when it comes to our brand, the quality of our products and the service we provide our guests,” Jane Almeida, a Tim Hortons spokesperson, told the Canadian Press. “Therefore, we will be taking steps to protect our brand and trademarks, including closing down this imitation restaurant.”

It’s just really the logo they’re stealing though, because as you enter the cafe things take a of a stark turn, according to the Tim Hottens Facebook page. Inside, instead of the familiar cream white and red tables and hard booths we’re used to, you have a swanky nightclub(y) thing with dice hanging from the roofs and loudly painted walls. In one of the company’s Facebook posts they advertise for a party complete with DJs.

CP reports that the menu is a little different from the Canuck version as well. Tim Hottens includes alcohol and pub food like burgers, wraps and what not. One reviewer wrote that the food was “delicious.” In a move that must have certainly added insult to injury to the Tim Hortons reps dealing with this, one reviewer wrote the coffee served at Tim Hottens was the “best… I ever had”—no one, NO ONE, is saying this about the coffee at the Canadian Timmies because Tim Hortons coffee is not the best you’ve ever had.

To put it lightly, it hasn’t been the best year for Timmies. Their no-good-very-bad year includes news coming out about some of their franchises (including the heirs to the Hortons fortune) fucking over their workers in response to a minimum wage increase, someone angrily pooping in one of their restaurants, and watching Canadians turn on them over and over. Frankly, this news story about a cafe in India ripping them off is the best coverage they’ve had all year.

So, folks, with that in mind, I’m here to say I think it’s time. I think it’s time to embrace the new over the old, to envelope change in a warm hug, and to fully accept Tim Hottens into our hearts. I am here to state proudly that we should hand over the keys of the brand most associated with Canada to this little cafe in India because I mean… they can’t do much worse.

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