Last week, as the music-loving nation of England reengineered their career goals to focus on becoming “the dude who holds a flamethrower behind Kanye West,” some ground-breaking news reports surfaced, claiming the rapper was about to lose his mind.
On Friday afternoon, it was consistently reported throughout the UK that Kanye West “REFUSED” to speak to host Jonathan Ross on his ITV show before “STORMING OFF THE STAGE.” Here’s a selection of the gripping headlines:
As you can see—because you have eyes and can recognize facts when you see them—the news reported Kanye West was on the brink of a “MELTDOWN,” and, by all accounts, the weekend’s Jonathan Ross show was going to act as an outlet for Kanye West losing his goddamn mind. So I tuned in and prepared for the most controversial and divisive performance of my lifetime. Here’s how it played out:
Apparently, it all happened at the tail-end of Yeezy’s performance of “Only One”. Fast-forward to 2:50 and witness, with your own eyes, the deterioration of Kanye West’s sanity. Pretty crazy right?!!!!!
As you can see, Yeezy is so livid and unstable, he only shakes Jonathan Ross’ hand TWICE. He also jokes with the presenter about being on the floor and laughs jovially, but I think we can all agree his gentle laughter is that of a man on the brink of an abject meltdown, right? And when Ross cracks an incendiary joke about Kim and Kanye smiles peacefully, we can all agree that the serene expression is actually shrouded in tempestuous storm clouds, isn't it?
I, for one, am incredibly concerned, and grateful that news outlets brought this quite unbelievable moment to my attention.
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