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Dirty Beaches' European Food Tour - Part Two

Dirty Beaches is sending us updates about everything that they eat on tour.

All photos by Alex Zhang Hungtai and Jesse Locke

Following our Italian odyssey and its overload of bomb-ass food, week two of tour shot us into Switzerland. A pair of festivals brought us to Baden’s One of a Million and Le Lignon’s Antigel, highlighted by a gig in a swimming pool with ripper duo Hanni El Khatib. Playing to a crowd in bikinis and banana hammocks was a trip, but for such a twee, deep-pocketed country, the meals were surprisingly meh.

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Deadly smoked salmon paninis from a non-descript cafe caused a stomach-busting bout of food poisoning for Alex that was only cured by the advice of our former tour mate Frankie: swig the magical elixir, apple cider vinegar.

Seizing a chance for international cuisine, our two-day break in Paris kicked off with a sushi love boat for two, pho for Alex on the mend, and a hazy night drinking Zubrówka underneath the Notre Dame. The next day our hungover bellies were grateful for legit soupe á l’oignon gratinée, despite the waiter’s protests that we hadn’t ordered enough. After paying our respects to Edith Piaf and The Lizard King at Pere Lachaise, we chowed down on couscous at a friendly spot on the wrong side of the tracks and fell into a stupor sleep.

Amiens immediately felt more hospitable as we met one-man hype machine Lewis Floyd Henry and became fast friends with his crew of two dudes named Chris. The pre-show meal at Lune de Pirates was a mouth-watering offering of salmon tartare, steak frites, and buttery fish, followed by richer than rich chocolate mousse, raspberry fingers, and the obligatory espresso. Barreling through our set with full stomachs, this spin through France was already off to a good start.

Roubaix’s grimy streets at first seemed unwelcoming, but the maison des artistes at La Condition Publique was a welcome alternative to our endless string of hotel rooms. Oddly, dinner offered the opposite situation — delicious looking cuts of beef that turned out to be ice-cold bowling balls in our stomachs. Rather than nuking it, we opted to plow through and soak it all down with some whiskey. C’est la vie…

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The small town of Joué-les-Tours offered another surprise with its high-tech artist centre Le Temps Machine. The homecooked dinner of curry chicken, fish casserole and chocolate bonbons was a treat, but we were even more excited to share the stage with Yann Tiersen and his latest project, Elektronische Staubband. This synth collector’s wet dream saw the pop composer in Tangerine Dreamland, joined by two fellow cosmonauts in a tower of Moogs, Arps, Junos, vocoders and other expensive toys. Their whole set was a bliss-out, but the best moment came when the band’s dog wandered on stage, barely batting an eye at the seizure inducing sounds and visions.

France was three for three at this point, but nothing could have prepared us for Montpellier. Cruising from winter’s bummed-out greys into the quasi-desert climates of the south was a jaw-dropper, and the city’s sleek streets felt like paradise. It’s tough to remember everything we scarfed down for supper at an Italian restaurant on the venue’s generous tab, but there was definitely a pizza with an egg on it, steak skewers, ice cream sundaes, lots of red wine and a flaming crème brulet.

Our guest for the night was the fun-loving Etienne Jaumet, who easily eclipsed Yann Tiersen’s previous synthcapade with his own ecstatic kraut-techno-sax solo mission into the stratosphere. Best artist we’ve played with yet by a country mile. As Etienne’s post-show DJ set stretched into the wee hours, we opted instead to hit up a three a.m. McDonald’s drive-through. Our “Royale with Cheese” moment came when we learned that France’s Filet of Fish comes covered in ketchup (blech!), but not even this Euro ridiculousness could spoil our night.

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Bouncing back into Paris, we arrived at the venue/restaurant and wolfed down a quick meal of chicken roti, more fish for Frank and the trip’s millionth chocolate mousse. That night’s mismatched bill of Danish wank-rockers Dewolff and bookish pop band Coming Soon left us unsure of what to expect, but the show went off without a hitch yet again. Cognac and Jameson made our final show in La Rochelle a bit of a blur, but it was definitely another fun night. In the immortal words of Nic Cage: Vive la fuckin’ France, man!

TO BE CONTINUED…

Previously - Dirty Beaches' Euro Food Tour Part One