So listen, I really have no time for Instagram because Serial’s back and all I really want to do is keep replaying the podcast to hear the sweet sounds of “Mail Kimp.” If you don’t know what that means then you’re sleeping on a really intense series that apparently only captures my attention because of mispronounced words in the ads before it. Anyway, lots of fun shit this week guys! Check it out.
A video posted by @plies on Dec 9, 2015 at 6:38pm PST
What’s a morning without hearing Plies attempt to sing Adele? I mean really, it’s all you can ask for as a “pick me up,” right? That hook is the 2015 version of when everyone attempted to sing Whitney Houston’s rendition of “I Will Always Love You.” So tender. Now if you’ll excuse me, I think I have an ear infection.
A photo posted by diplo (@diplo) on Dec 10, 2015 at 6:41pm PST
Only their mothers (and anyone who enjoys music) can tell them apart.
A photo posted by Miley Cyrus (@mileycyrus) on Dec 7, 2015 at 9:36am PST
Miley’s Instagram looks like what I assume being on K2 feels like. Seriously, this page is like the inside of my mind when I have the flu. Sidebar, I totally thought baby Miley to the right was Amanda Bynes. How sad.
A photo posted by Alicia Keys (@aliciakeys) on Dec 11, 2015 at 6:17pm PST
I can totally relate to this #squadgoals pic, because I would totally be Missy aka the only one not wearing a dress and with my hair in my face. All three of these ladies are fabulous though.
A photo posted by ALESSIA CARA (@alessiasmusic) on Dec 7, 2015 at 10:55am PST
SLAYING AT 19. ALESSIA IS SLAYING AT 19!!! YASSS!!!! OR [insert something a 19-year-old would say because I sound old as fuck yelling “YASSSS” at her.]
A photo posted by 2 Chainz Aka Tity Boi (@hairweavekiller) on Dec 11, 2015 at 6:58am PST
2 Chainz When you think you’re double jointed and then you see 2 Chainz’ nipples-baring friend and you realize that your half-assed yoga moves will never compare to a contortionist stripper.
Honestly im not trying to show off!! I am so proud and grateful of the things that I have been blessed with and don't take it for granted. I feel so blessed that I STILL get excited and ask my friends to take a picture of me with it.. Never think I'm trying to throw it in your face !!
A photo posted by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on Dec 11, 2015 at 8:03pm PST
“Guys, listen, I’m the Biebs and I’m a God-fearing human being just like you. If I’m leaned up against this here Lambo it’s only because I’ve earned it and I honestly love expensive cars, guys. Come on, let me be happy. Hashtag humble.” Hashtag rolling my fucking eyes. Lemme get a ride though.
A photo posted by DJ KHALED (@djkhaled) on Dec 11, 2015 at 8:40pm PST
Oh calm down Khaled.
A photo posted by Chief Keef (@chiefkeefsossa) on Dec 9, 2015 at 5:31pm PST
Fun fact: Chief Keef smokes those basic chopstick tongs kids use when they can’t use real chopsticks at PF Changs.
A photo posted by The Game (@losangelesconfidential) on Dec 11, 2015 at 8:58pm PST
It’s been like three weeks since the #meatprint made a cameo. Can someone throw a bucket of water on Game’s pants? Stop being all “I am more than my meat,” Jayceon.
A photo posted by JoJo (@iamjojo) on Dec 9, 2015 at 8:22am PST
Jojo is out here looking Brooke Shields in Jordache Jeans level hot when she thinks about Cuban food. Meanwhile the rest of us look like Grimace from McDonald’s when we think about any food.
A photo posted by skrillex (@skrillex) on Dec 10, 2015 at 6:29pm PST
Where in the world did Skrillex find a praying Ronald McDonald?
A photo posted by Selena Gomez (@selenagomez) on Dec 8, 2015 at 6:51pm PST
So Selena Gomez ate a Big Mac before performing on the Victoria’s Secret runway, and I have to Master Cleanse before every holiday party. Sidebar: this is like the third McDonald’s endorsement in a row in the column this week. Send me fries, Ronald.
A photo posted by raury (@raury) on Dec 11, 2015 at 7:45pm PST
I love these “candid” photos of Raury looking like a model while his dog takes a shit. Love him.
A photo posted by snoopdogg (@snoopdogg) on Dec 11, 2015 at 11:45am PST
Well here’s a friendship that should never happen. Does PeeWee still have like 30 of those suits or is it just one filthy one?