The state of Texas, having solved all other problems on earth, has proposed a bill, titled House Bill 1549, introduced by a newly elected state representative. Hillary Hickland will prohibit the sale of “obscene devices like vibrators and dildos from mainstream retailers like CVS, Target, and Walmart.”
Of course, as all these sex-hating weirdos say every time they want to ban anything related to sex, it’s about protecting children. It has nothing to do with the deep-seated inadequacies and insecurities they’re trying to project onto the populace.
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The bill would slap these major retailers with civil penalties and allow local governments to take legal action against them. Should it pass, however, it would not apply to sex shops that specifically sell these kinds of devices. It’s just more of the culture war bullshit waged by Republicans both in Texas and across the US that has seen them go after everything from “lewd” books to drag performances to really any depictions of a person’s sexual identity.
They would rather you not know that it’s possible to have sex without producing a baby or even, gasp, to have sex with people not of the opposite gender! Again, an entire political party that makes their insecurities your problem.
This whole thing is kind of like putting a hat on a hat given Texas’ long, strange, uncomfortable history with sex toys. Texas already has laws in the books prohibiting the sale of “obscene devices,” aka any device primarily for stimulating your junk. A law passed in 2003 made it illegal to own six or more vibrators or dildos. It’s safe to say that the law is extremely stupid, a waste of everyone’s time, and completely unenforceable. Again, Texas Republicans are just projecting their insecurities about sex onto you and making you deal with it.
Hickland’s bill would merely be another anti-sex toy law to throw onto the pile, only this time it’s a rare instance of a Republican going after a major corporation—but only because this major corporation dared to acknowledge that its adult customers enjoy sex.
Most people just want easy access to vibrators and to move on with their lives. Don’t worry about kids at Target getting corrupted by the sight of a sex toy on the highest shelf. They’re too busy looking at their iPads to notice. Besides, that iPad is probably corrupting your kid way more than the sight of a vibrator ever could.
