The Hangover News

Protester Concessions
DEMONSTRATORS ABANDONED KIEV CITY HALL
They ended their three-month occupation after jailed activists were released 

Kiev city hall during its occupation (Photo by Henry Langston)

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Anti-government protesters in Ukraine ended their almost three-month occupation of Kiev city hall this weekend.

The exit was in exchange for the release of all activists jailed during the country's recent demonstrations, and by no means signals a win for the authorities.

Once the building had been emptied, crowds remained outside and vowed to seize it again if the government failed to drop all criminal charges against the freed protesters.

In other news, it doesn't look like the country is any closer to finding an end to the recent unrest, as top opposition leader Arseniy Yatsenyuk again rejected the opportunity to become prime minister in a coalition government.

Yatsenyuk said he wouldn't accept the post until President Viktor Yanukovych made further concessions, including constitutional reform that reduced presidential powers.

Radical Legislation
THIS GUY WAS HANDED THE FIRST 'ANTI-TERROR' ASBO
Muslim convert Jordan Horner has been ordered to stop preaching in public

Jordan Horner

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Jordan Horner, a Muslim convert from northeast London, became the privileged recipient of Britain's first "anti-terror" ASBO.

The 20-year-old had taken part in street patrols in east London that promoted extreme versions of Islam and allegedly distributed leaflets and posters advertising a "sharia controlled zone" in Waltham Forest.

His ASBO, among other orders, bans him from preaching in public, defacing public adverts, being in possession of a megaphone in public and entering any educational establishments, unless he is a student there.

Horner's case is likely the first of a series of "anti-terror" ASBOs to be issued by the government, after Downing Street revealed last year that they have identified 25 extremist clerics they wish to silence with the new orders.

Fatal Arguments
THE LOUD MUSIC MURDER CASE ENDED IN A MISTRIAL
The jury couldn't decide whether the defendant was guilty of murder 

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A jury has failed to reach a decision on whether a Florida man who shot a teenager dead over a dispute about loud music was guilty or had acted in self defence, forcing the judge to declare a mistrial.

Michael Dunn shot 17-year-old Jordan Davis at a Jacksonville petrol station in November of 2012 after David refused to turn down the music in his car.

State attorney Angela Corey theorised that Dunn had "lost it" because he was "disrespected by a mouthy teenager", before firing ten shots into Davis' SUV.

Dunn, however, insists he remained calm and didn't reach for his gun until Davis started swearing and threatening to kill him.

While they couldn't reach a decision on the first-degree murder charge, the jury convicted Dunn on three lesser counts of attempted second-degree murder and shooting into an occupied vehicle.

The case re-opened the controversy over Florida's "stand your ground" law, seven months after George Zimmerman killed another unarmed black teenager – Trayvon Martin – and was acquitted in court.

More Government-Mandated Homophobia
UGANDA'S PRESIDENT WAS CONDEMNED FOR APPROVING AN ANTI-GAY BILL
Which sounds about right

Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni with Condoleezza Rice (Photo via)

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Ugandan President Yoweri Museveni has been condemned by medical professionals and rights campaigners for announcing that he would approve the country's new anti-homosexuality laws.

The reason medical professionals are pissed off – apart from all the general rage associated with government-mandated homophobia – is because a government spokesman tweeted that Museveni would sign the bill "after 14 medical experts presented a report that homosexuality is not genetic but a social behaviour".

It is currently unclear who these "medical experts" are, or how they came to the conclusion that being gay is because of something to do with society.

The bill, which is popular in Uganda, prescribes life imprisonment for "aggravated homosexuality".

Again, it is unclear exactly what "aggravated homosexuality" means, but the law bans the promotion of homosexuality, introduces prison sentences as punishment for anyone who fails to report gay people to the authorities and allows life sentences to be imposed for various same-sex acts, including touching in public.

Terrible Ideas
DON'T FILM YOURSELF HAVING SEX WITH DOGS
Because your girlfriend might find it and report you to the police 

(Photo via)

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If you're having sex with dogs, stop having sex with dogs.

If you can't stop having sex with dogs, don't film yourself doing so, before leaving your mobile around for your girlfriend to find.

Wayne Bryson, a 19-year-old from Lincolnshire, did just that – and the dog he filmed himself having sex with happened to be his girlfriend's Staffordshire bull terrier, prompting her to turn him into the authorities.

Bryson told police that he can't explain his actions, but insists the recorded act was the first and only time he's ever had sex with a dog.

The teenager was granted bail, on the condition he isn't alone with any animals until his sentencing, and faces a maximum of two years imprisonment.