MICK HUCKNALL WENT INTO PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING
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Someone in the crowd waved a banner reading "Cape Town".
A MAN WITH A REMARKABLY LONG CHIN TOOK A SHIT IN A LIFT IN HOXTON
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The reporter from the Hackney Gazette described the man's feces as a "calling card".
WILEY ANNOYED LOADS OF ASIANS ON TWITTER
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Jay Sean is offended and incapable of writing songs as good as this.
A HORSE VOMITED UP A McDONALD'S CHEESEBURGER
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Those on the scene speculated that the beast hurled because "horses don't eat meat, they eat grass."
ONE RICH, MIDDLE-AGED MAN CRITICISED THREE RICH, MIDDLE-AGED MEN
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Steve Coogan is repping the Mexican fam.
A MAN WENT MAD WITH A GUN AT A FRAT HOUSE IN AMERICA
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No one knows why yet.
MAC HACKETT