FYI.

This story is over 5 years old.

Sports

We Handed out the NHL Version of the Oscar Awards

John Scott (obviously), the Washington Capitals and Patrick Kane headline our selections.
Photo by Christopher Hanewinckel-USA TODAY Sports

The Academy Awards are just a few days away and the Oscars got us thinking: If the NHL were to hand out Academy Awards to teams, players and coaches, who would take home statues so far? Read on for our picks.

Best Picture (Best Team)–Washington Capitals

The Capitals have emerged as the most dominant team in the NHL and have the record to prove it. They currently have a ten-point lead on the Dallas Stars for top spot in the league.

READ MORE: The Blockbuster Deadline Deal Rarely Leads to a Stanley Cup

Advertisement

Sure, only two of the last 12 Presidents' Trophy winners have gone on to win the Stanley Cup and the Capitals must not like those odds. Yet there is both a killer instinct and a calm belief that this is their year. Armed with the best goalie in the game right now in Braden Holtby, depth scoring, horses on the back-end and, oh yeah, some guy by the name of Alex Ovechkin scoring at a torrid pace (1.98 goals per 60 minutes, his highest rate in the last eight seasons), the Capitals have all the pieces in place. Those who watch this team every game are continually amazed at how well they perform night-in, night-out—they're a cinematic masterpiece.

Can the Caps be stopped this season? —Photo by Brace Hemmelgarn-USA TODAY Sports

The Stars were early-season contenders for the crown but some gaps in the plot in January made them tough to follow. The Chicago Blackhawks were also in the mix but, seriously, we've all seen that film before, haven't we?

Best Director (Best Coach)–Gerard Gallant, Florida Panthers

Gallant took a bunch of castaway actors and rejuvenated them to the point that they're turning in performances of a lifetime. Pulp Fiction, anyone?

The Florida Panthers roster is virtually unchanged from the one that finished sixth in the Atlantic Division last season but Gallant has inspired this club and turned it into one of the most surprising teams of the season. There's still one quarter of the season left for this team to regress to its underlying numbers (47.5 even-strength Corsi For percentage, 25th in the NHL). But the Academy has a history of awarding overachieving coaches with this award, such as Patrick Roy's 2013-14 Colorado Avalanche (46.9 even-strength Corsi For percentage, 25th in the NHL).

Advertisement

Roy's Avalanche were bounced in the first round of the playoffs at the hands of the Minnesota Wild and it's not unreasonable to see that happening to Gallant's Panthers.

Barry Trotz of the Capitals was certainly in the running and there's precedent there (eight of the last ten winners of Best Director also nabbed Best Picture). But for different reasons altogether, none of the last ten winners of the NHL's Jack Adams Trophy as Best Coach have been at the helm of the Presidents' Trophy winning team. Trotz is a qualified, if not elite, coach but the roster he's working with is light years ahead of what Gallant has on the ice.

Best Actor (Best Player, Western Conference)–Patrick Kane, Chicago Blackhawks

A controversial choice and it remains to be seen how the Professional Hockey Writers Association will treat Kane's lights-out season, but on the ice, it is just that: an incredible achievement. Kane is currently on pace for an 109-point campaign through 82 games, which will be the highest total since Evgeni Malkin's 109-point season in 2011-12. Kane's 26-game point streak this season was prolific but he hasn't stopped scoring since.

Barring injury, Kane already has the Art Ross Trophy locked up. —Photo by David Banks-USA TODAY Sports

The Blackhawks possess an incredible amount of depth, but Kane has taken his playmaking talents to another level this season. He can change the course of a game very easily and if he stays healthy, Chicago will remain a threat in the Western Conference.

Jamie Benn and Taylor Hall received some votes here but Kane's performance this season is one of the best in the post-lockout era.

Advertisement

Best Actor (Best Player, Eastern Conference)–Braden Holtby, Washington Capitals

You can point to the star-studded cast the Capitals have and argue that they might just be fine with another goalie. But good teams thrive on knowing they're safe to take offensive liberties if they have a man like Holtby between the pipes. He is on pace to play 68 of 82 games, and with the win percentage he has right now he would eclipse Martin Brodeur's record for most wins in a season (48 in 2007-07) by a few games. But other stats including save percentage (.923) and goals against average (2.22) are impressive, given his workload.

Petr Mrazek and Cory Schneider received justified attention in this category. But this was a case of a performer that, when he first started, we all knew would win the award someday. Now is his time.

Best Supporting Actor (Second Best Player On Respective Team, Western Conference)–Tyler Seguin, Dallas Stars

It was a toss-up between Benn and Seguin when picking the second-best player on the Stars. Benn got the slight edge on points on the fact that he wears the "C" but that shouldn't discount the offensive performance Seguin has put on all season. The chemistry this duo has displayed has been unlike any other in the league. Seguin would certainly be an offensive dynamo without Benn. Together, though, they're magic. Think Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal. Or don't.

Seguin and Benn, also known as Jamyler Segbenn. —Photo by Matt Kartozian-USA TODAY Sports

Best Supporting Actor (Second Best Player On Respective Team, Eastern Conference)–Dylan Larkin, Detroit Red Wings

In the past, there have been a number of young, up-and-coming actors who've come virtually out of nowhere to win this award. The film itself might not completely revolve around this character but their performance is so striking that it deserves recognition. Think a 29-year-old Cuba Gooding Jr. in Jerry Maguire or 29-year-old Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight.

Dylan Larkin was always projected to be a solid NHL player, but as a 19-year-old rookie, he's bucked the recent Red Wings trend of letting players marinate in the AHL until they're more than ready. Larkin's speed and goal-scoring prowess certainly isn't as valuable to the team as Mrazek's save percentage or Henrik Zetterberg's experience, but the punch of energy he's brought has Detroit figuring heavily into the Eastern Conference playoff picture.

Advertisement

Best Writing, Original Screenplay (Best Writing In The NHL)–John Scott at the NHL All-Star Game

Something gigantic and outlandish is going to have to happen throughout the rest of this season to top John Scott as the story of the year. And Scott's story showed the power of the written word.

First, a few hockey writers turned NHL fans onto the idea of voting John Scott to the All-Star Game with a proposal to write him in on the ballot. And during the game itself, after Hall, Johnny Gaudreau and Roberto Luongo were nominated toward the end of the game as the MVP candidates, fans at the Bridgestone Arena started chanting Scott's name and had him elected as the game's MVP as a, you guessed it, write-in candidate. He stole the show.

READ MORE: The NHL Reached a New Low By Leveraging John Scott's Kids Against Him

But perhaps the most powerful written association was Scott's powerful piece on the Players' Tribune, defending his decision to attend the All-Star Game against the league's wishes. Scott went deep on his backstory and career and won over the entire hockey world with his tale of everyman glory. "You can't write this stuff," he told the assembled media after the All-Star Game, but clearly the Academy would disagree.

Best Animated Short Feature (Best Young Team)–Buffalo Sabres

According to NHL Numbers, the average age of the Buffalo Sabres is just a shade over 26 and they're currently the second-youngest team in the league. When you consider that the core of the Sabres team is under 24 years of age (Ryan O'Reilly, Jack Eichel, Rasmus Ristolainen) but have shown great strides in maturing this season, there should be exciting days ahead in the Queen City. Sure, 23-year-old Evander Kane has some maturing to do, but every cartoon needs the villain that eventually comes around in the end. Like every short film, we can't be too sure if this team will hold up in the long run.

Best Visual Effects (Best Goaltending Equipment)–Garret Sparks, Toronto Maple Leafs

In a season that has had virtually no bright spots for the Maple Leafs, the story of Garret Sparks was a heartwarming change of pace. Sparks backstopped the Leafs to a shutout in his NHL debut, the first Leaf ever to do so. He subsequently teared up afterward and continued his newsworthy short stint in the NHL by donning a pair of blue and white checkered pads very similar to those worn by former Calgary Flames goalie Trevor Kidd in the 90s.

Looking good, Mr. Sparks. —Photo by Bruce Fedyck-USA TODAY Sports

Advertisement

Sparks was surprised with a dressing room pop-in from Kidd after his debut shutout win but, perhaps not surprisingly, was tagged for six goals in his second NHL game.

Best Costume Design (Best New Logo/Uniform)–Colorado Avalanche

The winner of this award was a given as soon as the categories were announced. The Anaheim Ducks third jersey looks like something that would be at home in a shitty 90s rave and the new New York Islanders logo and jersey, done to mark their move to Brooklyn, does very little to inspire.

But the new Colorado Avalanche third jersey? Home run. An ode to the Colorado Rockies franchise of the late 70s/early 80s, the Avalanche jersey keeps the colour scheme but still honours one of the dopest, and severely underrated throwback jerseys. It's big and bold but still slick all the same. Sure, their Stadium Series jersey leaves a little to be desired but that doesn't detract from their stunner of an alternate sweater.

Best Cinematography (Best Highlight)–Connor McDavid's Goal against the Blue Jackets

If you don't watch this goal and feel warm and fuzzy about McDavid's future in the NHL, you might be dead inside.

Best Hairstyling (Best Hockey Hair)–Jaromir Jagr, Florida Panthers

Few sports are so closely associated with a hairdo but there is a reason "Hockey Hair" (flow, I hear the kids are calling it) never goes out of style. There's probably a lot of players who secretly yearn to have their helmet knocked off and finish their shift with the cold air blowing through their locks.

Jaromir Jagr has had an incredible season and at 44 years old, we might have discovered his secret: his iconic mullet is making a comeback. Our story begins before the season when Panthers goalie Roberto Luongo made it his mission to bring back Jagr's old mullet. The plot thickened when Jagr said that he had to indeed grow his locks out. The plot then took a remarkable twist when P.K. Subban dressed like Jagr, complete with mullet and all, to win the breakaway challenge at this season's All-Star skills competition.

Advertisement

Thanks for that, P.K. —Photo by Christopher Hanewinckel-USA TODAY Sports

We're still getting updates on the growth of Jagr's hair but by season's end, a generation of fans will come to understand why, in part, Jagr is so revered. This was a remake of a classic that may very well succeed.

Best Original Song (Best Goal Song)–The Nashville Predators

The NHL had a real love-in with Nashville a few weeks back during the All-Star Game as fans and media raved about the city. Even from your couch, you couldn't escape the honky-tonk vibe and the Predators have done quite well to capture the vibe of the city in their goal song. Beginning with Tim McGraw's "I Like It, I Love It" complete with a new nod to the Predators scoring, the song quickly shifts gears into the Black Keys "Gold on the Ceiling" complete with fans having the opportunity to shout "You suck!" at the opposing team. It's unconventional, but a lot of people said that about the NHL moving to Nashville in 1998.

Best Foreign Language Film (Best Young Player Born Outside Of North America)–Artemi Panarin, Chicago Blackhawks

With 57 points through 61 games to lead all rookies, the 21-year-old Russian winger is making it look easy this season playing on a line with Kane. The "Bread Man" bears a striking resemblance to Kane, too. While his scoring instinct certainly benefits by playing with Kane, that he was signed as a free agent this summer (after finishing fifth in the KHL in scoring in 2014-15) has to have a few other teams in the league frustrated they didn't try to scoop him up. He might be due for regression next season, but Blackhawks fans are enjoying his rookie year while it lasts.