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Kill the Engine

Anarchy and Jesus Fish?

Here's some musty dusty stuff I dug up at my parents' house over Memorial Day weekend that makes me get all teary and nostalgic.

I thought I'd start this week off by showing you a couple of videos that I've mentioned in previous columns. Remember two weeks ago when I was talking about a video that my buddy Adam Young made for his solo show at the Common House? The beer bottle opening video? No? You don't remember? Well, it doesn't really matter. Just watch below and you'll get the idea.

Beautiful, huh? And remember a few more weeks back when I was talking about a commercial we were filming for Roger Skateboards and Fairdale Bikes? No? You don't remember that either? Well, it doesn't matter. Just hit play and it will all make sense.

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So, what else has been going on? Well, I went to my folks' house over the Memorial Day weekend. I love visiting my parents for a myriad of reasons that mostly have to do with love, respect, family, etc. But also because they have an outbuilding on their property that's literally filled to the brim with shit from my young life. And every time we (my wife, child, and I) visit, at some point I sneak out to the outbuilding and dig through some old musty and dusty boxes and get all teary and nostalgic about the days of yore.

Here's a snippet of my trip to the outbuilding, while my family was inside getting the potato salad ready:

One of my childhood favorites. Looking back, this stuff seems almost like a weird art project to me. Or at least a highly conceptual take on punk rock. It was smart and funny. It definitely struck a chord with me. It wasn't just dudes complaining about being misunderstood.

No date on this thing, but I'm guessing sometime around 1989. Peanut Butter? Sure, why not?

Four of probably three-hundred t-shirts in the pile.

I made this for my old zine, Programmed from India. I wish I'd heeded my own advice.

If you ask any 15-year-old skate kid today what L.E. stands for, they'll tell you, "Life Extension." But if you ask any of my almost 40-year-old buddies, they'll give you a different answer—"lilelephant." Barely making shit since 1994.

Not sure what I can say about VCJ (Victor Courtland Johnson) that hasn't already been said, but some twenty-odd years later I'm still blown away by this dude's illustrations. His impact on skateboard graphic design is unmeasurable. Or is it immeasurable? Either way, his designs have spanned generations effortlessly.

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In all honesty, this is actually my stepbrother's t-shirt. Kind of crazy that it's from 1988 and it's a dude doing a kickflip vs. a judo air. Or is it a heel flip? Kinda hard to tell. Rad rooster hairdo no matter what. Anybody know who drew this? The signature says "Ken '88." Burnett? You reading this? Any ideas?

And onto a few of my prized possessions. Remember Eight Ball Clothing? No? Wish I could say the same thing. It's kind of awesome that this t-shirt is almost exactly as wide as it is tall. It's like wearing a humongous burnt orange flour sack over your torso. Oh man, the early 90's were really an embarrassingly awesome time to be a teenager.

This is the kind of thing that has given me unconditional forgiveness for the fashion follies of youth. Anytime I hear old dudes at the skatepark making fun of young kids with their skin tight jeans and turquoise sneakers, my brain immediately conjures up an image of this t-shirt along with the bright orange XXL Fuct pants that accompanied the outfit. I've got absolutely no room to talk. At least kids these days don't look like melting curtains with yellow hair.

The only thing I regret about this sweatshirt is that I bought it in a small instead of a medium. I've only gone up one size since I was 12 and if I'd been thinking ahead I could still be wearing this thing. R.I.P. Zulu's, and R.I.P. Goodtimes. I've got a soft spot in my heart for San Antonio, TX. (Go Spurs!)

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The first three skateboard decks I owned are also in the clutter. Anarchy and Jesus Fish? I have no idea.

I'm not going to pretend that there's not a Nike Swoosh in the grip tape design. Sometimes you just gotta do it.

A friend told me that if you sprayed your board with Off! insect repellent, you could wipe graphics off. It totally worked. And yes, Stüssy Reggae Man.

So what do you do with a board that doesn't have graphics on it? Looks like a Mike Sieben model is just begging to be drawn. (I was 14 years old, so please have mercy.)

Literally the closest I ever got to getting sponsored. Two sets of rail holes too, huh? Weird times.

Anyway, there's boxes upon boxes of my life in the aforementioned outbuilding, so anytime I'm short on content and I'm in Seguin, expect a similar trip down memory lane. Also, the first person to correctly name what board the Mike Sieben graphic is on wins an art print. That shape is a dead give-away.

Movie Review:

This serial killer dude gets sprayed with genetic goop and turns into a killer snow man. He also kind of rapes a girl and makes a joke about Christmas "cumming" early this year. Overall I'd say this might be the worst movie I've ever watched and I've seen one of the Transformers movies, so that's saying a lot.

Previously - The Weird Is Wearing Thin

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