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Vice Blog

LONDON - FEMINISM GETS A BOOST

Contemporary role model Lisa Connell has announced she's going to spend the money her mother saved up for her wedding on getting plastic surgery tip to toe in order to look like Demi Moore before she dies of a malignant, inoperable, eventually fatal brain tumor. "It's my body, my choice," she boldly exclaimed, pushing the popular women's lib slogan past those tired, dusty abortion rights issues and farther into the future than her out-of-touch, old-fashioned relatives can handle. Clearly they are not only misogynists, trying to persuade her of the beauty she naturally possesses, but also idiots, thinking they know better than someone with a hunk of disease inside her noggin. How dare they try to interfere with the visions of such a pioneer?