We all know at least a handful of nerds. Maybe your office has some nerds skulking about, avoiding the gazes of you and your coworkers. Perhaps these nerds are your children, whom you wish didn’t exist. You may even be dating a nerd right now and not know this nauseating fact. Well, honoring these nerds with gifts is the best way to keep them from getting restless and annoying you endlessly with trivia questions you don’t care about. You’ve got to empty your coffers to keep the nerds from a’bothering you. But you can’t just give your average outcast crony a copy of the Watchmen paperback. C’mon, he already has the Absolute Watchmen oversize hardback, you idiot. If you like your nerds enough to spend money on them but not enough to think about what those people want, just pick something off this list and your thoughts can shift back to makeup or your career. Obviously, much of this stuff is going to be Star Wars-related, since merely thinking about Star Wars is like taking a break from the stresses of day-to-day awfulness. PS If any of the manufacturers of the products mentioned in this list want to give me free shit I won’t put up a fight. My parents died when my planet blew up so no one gives me presents anymore.
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