What Your Pet Says About Your Love Language

On the surface, “must love dogs” sounds like a harmless dating preference. A throwaway line meant to weed out the anti-pet crowd. But more often, it’s doing something subtler—it’s shorthand for an entire emotional style.

According to Brie Temple, Chief Matchmaker at Tawkify, when someone uses that phrase, they’re not just talking about animals. “They are referring to how they connect, how they navigate the world day to day, and the type of relational energy they attract,” she says. It’s less about the actual dog and more about the rhythm of how a person gives and expects love.

Dog people tend to be emotionally forward. They crave closeness, consistency, and clear signals. They’re not afraid of daily check-ins or public affection. They don’t want to guess whether they’re wanted—they want to feel it. As Temple puts it: “Predictability is what love is.” Not routine for routine’s sake, but because stability feels like care.

Cat people move a bit differently. They’re slower to reveal themselves, more deliberate with emotion, and more comfortable with space. That doesn’t mean they’re distant. It means they pay attention to pacing. Love, for them, isn’t “in your face”—it’s thoughtful.

This is What Your Pet Says About Your Love Language

These styles can exist peacefully, but not without awareness. “A dog person will feel ignored while a cat person will feel suffocated,” Temple says. “If they are not openly and patiently communicating about those matters, those differences will slowly drive them apart.”

It’s also a matter of language. Dog people often express love through physical touch and shared time. Cat people lean toward small gestures, carefully chosen words, and an appreciation for presence without constant proximity. The signals are different. So are the assumptions.

I’ll admit, I’m a walking contradiction. I’m a dog person when it comes to actual animals. I will gladly interrupt a conversation to greet a golden retriever. But in relationships, I lean cat. I need space. I move slowly. I don’t like being rushed into emotional territory unless I know it’s solid. If I’m affectionate, it means I mean it.

This divide lines up neatly with attachment theory. Dog people often lean secure or anxious, which means they move toward intimacy. Cat people tend to be more avoidant, seeking space before they can trust it. Neither approach is wrong, but the misunderstanding between the two can turn a promising match into something brittle.

Of course, plenty of dog-cat pairings thrive—if both people are willing to meet in the middle. Dog people bring warmth and availability. Cat people bring depth and intentionality. When it works, it’s not because they’re the same. It’s because they learn how to listen to differences without trying to fix it.

So when someone says “must love dogs,” it’s not a pet preference. It’s a request: See me. Match my energy. Don’t make me translate how I love.