What’s the Most Important Thing You’ve Ever Lost?


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This weekend, David Cameron left his red box unattended on a train to Edinburgh with the key still in the lock. No one knows what was in the box, but that didn’t seem to appease former Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott, who said, “I’m staggered that a prime minister should be so slack about looking after government secrets. The box could have contained detailed confidential intelligence about Syria.”

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Luckily, Cameron returned to his seat before anyone could make off with his important box. But had he lost it, it would have been a pretty important loss. That got me thinking about all the other important stuff people must have misplaced before, which then got me thinking about what exactly that stuff could have been. So, in an effort to find out, I asked some strangers a question: What’s the most important thing you’ve ever lost?    

Hannah: It was a small St Christopher pendant that I’d had since I was a baby. It totally disappeared.

Oh, that’s sad. What do you make of David Cameron leaving his briefcase behind?
No surprises there – it’s just another thing that he’s done.

Could you forgive him for it?
Not really. It’s among the many other bad, bad things he’s done.

Oh really? Where does it rank in his top ten of bad things?
It’s a steady six.

Dan: My bike got stolen recently; I’m very upset about it.

Why are you so upset?
I’ve never lost anything that’s truly important, because you can always replace stuff, can’t you? So I’ve never truly lost anything. I just think about what’s truly important. Sentimental possessions are the only thing that should cause us any concern.

What do you think about Cameron leaving his red box unattended?
Shit happens, my friend. You’ve got to be held accountable, but everyone is human at the end of the day.

Rafael: Something physical or something spiritual?

Let’s go with physical.
I forgot something on the train once – my graduation photos. I was very sad.

Oh dear. What are your thoughts on secret box-gate?
You shouldn’t do it – that’s monies, y’know?

I certainly do. Should Cameron be fired?
Yes, he should go to jail forever.

Azad: I’m not sure, but I lose my car keys and phone a lot.

Is there anything you wish you hadn’t lost?
My four years of uni – I repeated it twice.

Good answer.

Timea: I’ve lost nine phones and cameras.

Wow. All in a row?
Five in a row, then I stopped losing them for a bit. Every time I go to Ibiza, I lose a phone. Although they’re nothing that I can’t replace.

How do you feel about Cameron nearly losing our nation’s secrets?
I’m pretty sure he’s feeling pretty bad right now. Prison would be too much for him.

How would you punish him for becoming an inadvertent Snowden?
I’d take away some of his powers – something to do with information.

Make it so he can’t use the gym at Downing Street?
More than that. I’d make him sign a sheet every time he wants to get special information. He should feel bad.

Previously – Have You Ever Worked for an Abusive Boss?