WIN A COPY OF SEX: OUR BODIES, OUR JUNK

The Association of the Betterment of Sex is a consortium of the world's most distinguished researchers in the fields concerning the moist and penetrative. They have just completed Sex: Our Bodies, Our Junk, possibly the most important coital anthology of the current or any other generation.

The authors (Scott Jacobson, Todd Levin, Jason Roeder, Ted Travelstead, and Vice contributor Mike Sacks) have conducted extensive studies on the myriad ways to play pat-a-cake with genitals, foreplay, contraception, masturbation, and many other facets of animalistic sensuality. You'll also find information on the fetish known as "litterboxing," alternatives to the popular "dormroon occupied" doorknob sock, illustrated positions too hot for the Kama Sutra, information on rarely studied STDs like pubic wolves and 14-karat gonorrhea, "consensual twizzling," and good ol' fashioned butt fucking. As you may have picked up on, the tone of S:OBOJ is largely humorous.

We are giving away three copies of this celebrated fuckbook. All you have to do to score your own is email us a description of the most fantastical, disappointing, and/or disgusting sexual encounter you have ever experienced. They can be brief, but please include lots of details, and no bullshit stories. (Unless they are actually stories about bull shit.)

If you've never experienced the horrible, pungent bliss of human love, don't worry about it. The book only costs $12 on Amazon.