MLB All-Star Game's Lone Wolf Tenor: "Black Lives Do Matter." Gee, Thanks.

Remigio Pereira, the Canadian Tenor who added lyrics referencing "All Lives Matter"—a racist reaction to the Black Lives Matter movement—during a performance of "O Canada" before last week's MLB All-Star Game, wants to clear some things up. In the aftermath of his stunt, he was quickly criticized, and the remaining Tenors hastily distanced themselves from him and essentially kicked him out. In the days since, Pereira has tried to do some damage control, including this recorded message which is…honestly, I don't even know what to call it. A disaster, probably. A hilariously misguided and idiotic disaster.

He begins: "This is not a political statement: I don't agree with killing." So, that's what we're dealing with. Just wanted to let you guys know that I am not down with killing people. This will not be the dumbest thing he says. "So if I don't agree with killing," he continues, "then I don't agree with black people dying. I weep when I see videos…of a man, just trying to sell a CD and he gets…killed…murdered." The dramatic pause between two synonyms and general hushed tone of the whole thing lets you know this is really important to him. Also, the weeping.

This is where things get really good. "Good" in the sense that crazy shit is enjoyable to consume, anyway.

"No disrespect to Black Lives Matter because Black lives do matter. They most definitely do. I do not want to see anything happen to any of my black friends. Musician friends. This country was built through diversity, exchanging ideas, exchanging cultures. That's how we move ahead in society. Not segregating everyone. Not creating a hierarchy. There is no hierarchy. Who can be higher than God?"

There is no roadmap for this paragraph because Pereira has gone completely off the rails. He's on a different plane of existence where there is no hierarchy (???) except his black friends and God (?????). But at least we know that Black lives do, in fact, matter. Glad he was able to fit that in there with the rest of his gibberish, even though he clearly still doesn't understand what it actually means.

This all builds to a crescendo of nonsense that finally end with "and that is why everybody's life matters [pauses for, like, 20 seconds to pick his nose or something] I love you all."