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Indiana (4) vs. New Mexico State (13)It’s pretty crazy to think that no one knows where the term “Hoosier” came from.Olive’s pick: Indiana
Olive’s pick for VCU vs. Indiana on Saturday: VCU
Murray State (6) vs. Colorado State (11)Colorado State’s offense is a bit better than Murray State’s, but its defense is much, much worse. And Murray State has a fun name. It’s like calling a school University of Steve.Olive’s pick: Murray StateMarquette (3) vs. BYU (14)Here’s where we bitch that Brigham Young isn’t as good as UCLA, which didn’t make the tourney, and the Mormons at BYU don’t play basketball on Sunday because it’s the “Sabbath.” It’s the 21st century guys. Teenagers have sex, women get abortions, and you sometimes work on Sundays. Deal with it.Olive’s pick: MarquetteOlive’s pick for Marquette vs. Murray State on Saturday: Murray StateLouisville (4) vs. Davidson (13)The Cardinals have a much better chance of beating Davidson if Rick Pitino wears a white suit.Olive’s pick: LouisvilleNew Mexico (5) vs. Long Beach State (12)Long Beach State is one of the better low seeds in the country, but New Mexico is the best team from Mountain West. Not exactly a clash of titans here.
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Syracuse (1) vs. UNC Asheville (16)Syracuse center Fab Melo will not be eligible for the tourney for academic reasons, which hampers the Orange’s National Championship hopes and saddens fans of weird names everywhere. Shouldn’t matter in this game, since Asheville is not all that great at basketball.Olive’s pick: SyracuseKansas State (8) vs. Southern Miss (9)Quite a big gulf here, talent-wise, between the eight- and nine-seed, as Kansas State is among the top 25 teams in the country, per Ken Pomeroy rankings, and Southern Miss doesn’t scratch the top 50.Olive’s pick: Kansas StateOlive’s pick for Syracuse vs. Kansas State on Saturday: SyracuseWisconsin (4) vs. Montana (13)The Badgers are a four-seed, but they’re only the third best team in the Big Ten. Nonetheless, they could go farther in the tournament than say, Syracuse. Montana is on a hell of a winning streak, but Wisconsin has elite defense. You’d have to be some sort of hairless cat to predict who’d win this.Olive’s pick: WisconsinVanderbilt (5) vs. Harvard (12)Tommy Amaker’s Harvard squad got a tough draw here against its southern counterpart, but this is the best Ivy League team since Senator Bill Bradley’s 1965 Princeton squad that made the Final Four. Amaker’s recruiting has fallen under scrutiny, especially since Jeremy Lin sucks now.
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Iowa State (8) vs. Connecticut (9)Connecticut’s had a disappointing season but is talented, as usual. Iowa State, on the other hand, has to live with the indignity of letting human shitstain Paul Shirley graduate. The upset is that anyone buys Shirley’s book.Olive’s pick: ConnecticutOlive’s pick for Western Kentucky vs. Connecticut on Saturday: Western Kentucky
Gonzaga (7) vs. West Virginia (10)Remember Kevin Pittsnogle? He was kinda fat, but man could he shoot threes. There will probably be a bunch of white guys on the court at some point in this one.Olive’s pick: West VirginiaOhio State (2) vs. Loyola Maryland (15)Ohio State is the best amateur team in the country—Kentucky players make more than I do—and will spank Loyola Maryland like a depressed uptown call girl.Olive’s pick: Ohio StateOlive’s pick for West Virginia vs. Ohio State on Saturday: West VirginiaBaylor (3) vs. South Dakota State (14)Baylor has one of the better players in the region in Perry Jones III; South Dakota State is a team of midgets—you probably don’t know if we mean short people or actual midgets, since you haven’t seen them play.Olive’s pick: South Dakota State
UNLV (6) vs. Colorado (11)Bill Simmons, to his credit, once remarked that Shawn Marion will go down as the greatest UNLV player in NBA history, which is absolutely insane when you think about it.
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Olive’s pick for South Dakota State vs. UNLV on Saturday: UNLV
Check back tomorrow for Olive the Hairless Cat’s picks for the rest of the Round 1 games.
