It feels like just yesterday we were talking about how you should never bring food into the club, however tempting it might seem to sneak a few McNuggets in the back of your Cheap Mondays before telling the bloke on the door you're on the guestlist, and no, it's not you who stinks of breadcrumb coated, deep fried meat slurry, honestly, mate, it's not. Since then, we've had a video brought to our attention. In this video, a man called DJ Churrasco is pretending to DJ. Watch it below:So there you have it, that's DJ Currasco, pretending to DJ, using cold cuts as a pair of makeshift decks. That's it. That's what you've just watched. We have five questions about the video, and maybe you have the answers.We've googled "DJ Churrasco" and the results didn't exactly come back positive. We don't think he's actually a DJ. We think, and we've spent a good ten seconds or so thinking about this, that DJ Churrasco is just a man who enjoys eating slithers of meat and drinking pleasantly sized cups of lager and pretending to DJ because, for reasons only he knows, DJing is inherently funny. Have you seen DJ Churrasco out in the club? Let us know. I mean, there's this DJ Churrasco, but I don't think it's the same one, which means that DJ Churrasco should sue this one for image right's theft.Sometimes we wished that YouTube let you zoom in really, really, really close just so you could get a proper peep at whatever visual feast is on offer. Until they do that, us schmucks have to pause the video, take a screenshot, and then manually zoom in. Do you know how long that takes, YouTube? Do you know how disappointing the results are? Just look at them!WHAT IS THAT? HONESTLY, WHAT IS THAT!?Hey, buddy, yeah you, DJ Churrasco, take a quick break from stuffing your maw with whatever it is in the photo above and let us give you a bit of advice: real, cool DJs don't play Avicii! They play really boring techno records! Get with the programme, grandad!At what point did DJ Churrasco's admittedly gently humorous routine where he pretends to DJ while dipping unspecified food items in bowls of god knows what become so legendary that someone, presumably someone he knows quite well, thought, "mate, we've got to get this one on camera, this is good banter," and, thus, it became enshrined in the canon of banter? When did that happen? Why did it happen? Is it your fault?Is he still stood there, Beats on, pretending to DJ? Did someone drag him back in the house? The people need to know!If you have any of these answers, please get in touch with Josh on Twitter
Advertisement