Girl News

  • Girls and Hair

    “Should I get bangs?” is not a legit girl concern. Stop. Stop asking me this.

  • Girls and Moms

    My mom is very kind and beautiful in a way that is both ideal and traumatizing. Loves navy. Has never yelled at me at all ever and I was a strange and disappointing child.

  • Girls and Crying

    Tears taste good (and so does that santorum-y mixup of tears and warm nose liquid that drips on your lip after a really hardcore session).

  • Girls and 'Girls'

    In this special edish of Girl News we will consider the only thing that matters right now, which is Lena Dunham’s new joint "Girls."

  • Girls and Giving Up

    Giving up and giving in to just being regular is like finding a new continent made of fleece.

  • Girls and Porn

    It’s very difficult to get pornography right and yet it is a pretty constant girl-need, so in that way it is like…. Salad. Shoes? Bags. Lipstick?

  • Girls and Danger

    Danger is the subtext of girl-lives. All of them, all the time.

  • Girls and Girl on Girl

    It's time to get real low, like reeeal low, about girls plus gay. Or, "girls squared"/"girls nth" which is how perv-nerds think about lesbians, right? Maybe? I sure do.

  • Girls and Work

    Listen up, Teen Girl Squad. Avoid having a job for as long as possible, because once you get jumped into work culture you're preeetty much in for life.

  • Girls and Being Alone

    I realized today how long it's been since I've had sex. Is it a) three weeks b) two months c) eight months d) a backwards-shooting Jupiter-C rocket?

  • Girls and Exes

    Ex-boyfriends are the most powerful mutants because they know what your skin tastes like and how it feels when you hate them.

  • Girls and Staying In

    Pretty sure my overall project as a writer/human/girl is to convince other people that caring what other people think of you, especially of your social choices, is an infection.