When you're part of a generation of questionably dressed, overdraft-plundering adult babies, it's hard to believe you'll ever be able to grow up enough to be a dad.
Wonga sent out thousands of letters from non-existent lawyers to scare their broke clients into paying up.
Why are we trying to banish loneliness from the world?
For all that the Yanks care, he may as well have been a Commie jihadist.
Stealing the Pope's blood is a cry for help from today's forgotten devil worshipers.
Robin Thicke, Katie Hopkins, twerking: A year in fake furores.
Let's start with masturbating while a fire extinguisher's shoved up your arse.
No one's clinging on to their memories of "Last Train Home" at Leeds 2007 any more.
But it does tell us something about the coming age of corporate art.
Forcing the rich and the poor to co-exist rarely works.