This article originally appeared on VICE US.
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Breaking up is hard to do!
When romance dwindles and things cool down, there are certain ways to ease the pain of ending a relationship. What the signs value in partnerships can inform what they value in a breakup—some want you to break things off gently, while others respect confrontation.
Read on to learn how astrologers recommend you approach a breakup with each zodiac sign:
Aries is ruled by hot-headed, passionate Mars. This means they like things straight to the point, but their hair-trigger tempers also means they appreciate some courtesy. Don’t wait around to break up with them. As soon as you think you should break up, bring it up with them and nip any disagreements in the bud before they linger and get taken out of context. Aries can handle a break-up, but it’s nicer to part on amicable terms. Be up front about why you’re ready to go separate ways, and try not to be a jerk about it. Either way, they’re likely to get over it quickly. Even if things end in disaster, Aries can forgive and forget quickly, and will likely remain your friend.
As a fixed sign, Taurus will typically stay in a relationship for a long time, maybe even longer than they should. Once they are committed, they get comfortable and are in it for the long haul, so they are unlikely to make the first move when it’s time to end things, even if the breakup is long overdue. Taurus likes to debate the value of everything, so present them with honest facts. Tell them how both your lives will be better when you’re single, or how and why your relationship doesn’t work anymore. Don’t leave anything unclear. You’re in or you’re out.
Geminis would really like an explanation! As a Mercury-ruled air sign, Gemini has the reputation of being long-winded, so it’s likely they’ll want to have a lengthy discussion about why a relationship is ending. Be ready to talk about it when you’re about to break up with a Gemini. Generally speaking, though, as long as they have all the information about why you want to end things, Gemini will be chill and likely stay friends with you. On the flip side, if they think or can tell that you’re lying, they could make your life very hard, so be brutally honest! Gemini is likely to agree to a breakup if your relationship has become lackluster or boring, so consider making a point about how the relationship has lost its spark if the excitement has faded.
Lunar-ruled Cancers can have a hard time letting go if they have become attached… and chances are they have. Once you break up, they are likely to come back around, or at least feel nostalgic for your relationship. Be absolutely sure you’re ready to break up before you bring it up and don’t leave stuff around for you to pick up later. They want to know your connection wasn’t meaningless, so let them know what your relationship did for you and why you can’t be with them. For Cancers, it’s better if you just rip the band-aid off quickly. But you should also try to be gentle; one last hug might be nice! Choose to break up in a space where it’s safe for Cancer to cry and be vulnerable with their feelings—nothing is worse for them than feeling insecure in public where others can see their tender emotions.
A fixed sign, Leo can stay in a relationship for a while, but they’re not a stranger to burning bridges or jumping into a new relationship pretty quickly. Leo would much rather be the person doing the dumping than the one being dumped. Not being able to be the light of your life hurts their pride. You can always say “it’s not you, it’s me,” but if it’s actually them and not you, break it to them super gently and respectfully—and don’t expect them to be anything less than catty afterward. You’re going to have to give them time and space to process for sure.
You have to give Virgo space to process a breakup—Virgos love processing. They’re going to want to know why you want to break up, but keep it simple and make sure it is a conversation. They want a very thorough discussion where you can hash things out. Let them express their complaints about how hard breaking up is, even after the breakup is over. Schedule a breakup date, and if your boundaries allow for it and they’re into it, a post-breakup followup session. After processing with Virgo, you can both arrive at a final conclusion of the best route for your relationship—should you just be friends? Don’t try to redefine the past or make them feel bad or regretful about your relationship. Virgo is likely to feel bad if they feel at fault for the relationship heading south, so make sure to be specific and leave no doubt in their mind about what is and isn’t their fault. Tell them about their good qualities that will help them with a successful relationship later, leaving them inspired about what they have to offer rather than full of self-doubt.
If Libra isn’t ready to break up with you, they will try to get their way and charm you into staying. Unless the relationship has truly gone sour, Libra is really hard to dump, so you must have firm boundaries, and repeat yourself if they try to convince you to hang out again. They will try to barter with you, and may even try to make you jealous with a post-breakup makeover. You might have to disappear a little bit to get yourself out of their head, and to get them out of yours, too. They might take it a little easier if you offer a small (but appropriate) parting gift.
It’s not going to be easy to break up with a Scorpio, because they don’t let things go very easily, and as a Mars-ruled sign, they’re likely to want to get revenge if they feel you’ve betrayed them… But ghosting a Scorpio would be foolish because they will hunt you down and make you feel worse than if you’d just sucked it up and broken up with them in a dignified way. They don’t forget the way you made them feel, which can be good or bad depending on how you made them feel. Play your cards wisely, and don’t be surprised if they sleep with your friends or if their next partner looks exactly like you, but taller and hotter. Accept that Scorpio may never speak to you again after your break up—a scorched earth policy might be easier for them than anything else.
Sagittarius is one of the most straightforward, blunt signs of the zodiac. You have to be bold and outspoken, and really tell them exactly why you’re breaking up. They will respect you for being honest, but don’t be surprised if you get honesty right back! They want things to be fun and lighthearted, and will look on the bright side of even the worst heartbreaks. They can throw the whole relationship in the trash and never look back, so if you want to stay friends, you have to say so. They’re not going to know what you want unless you spell it out for them. Remind them of all the exciting things they were enjoying before they met you and they’ll be less likely to dwell on the situation for too long.
If you have to end your partnership with a Capricorn, be mature about it. Capricorn is ruled by Saturn and expects each person in a relationship to be held accountable for what they do or don’t bring to the table. Regardless of whether it’s a personality clash or something more practical in nature, Capricorns respect an honest, no B.S. breakup explanation. At least make it a learning moment for them and let them know it wasn’t a complete waste of time, because wasting time is something they deeply despise. Capricorn is not likely to do well with being broken up with if they feel your relationship was successful or that they brought enough to the table, and will likely argue about the efforts they made to make you happy rather than talking about fading feelings. If that’s the case, try to gently remind them it’s not all about tangible efforts—sometimes you just don’t feel the same way about each other and that can’t be fixed by working harder.
Aquarius is an air sign, so once you let them know that you’re not feeling so great and you need to talk, they’ll want to meet up and talk it out—likely for a long time! During this conversation, you’re going to have to stand your ground firmly. They are intelligent and can rationalize staying together just as much as they can rationalize breaking up. You have to give them reasons for the breakup, and don’t change your reasoning just because they sound smart. Tell them that you understand their point of view, but they need to respect yours. You may need to be patient with Aquarius while they sort out their feelings, but stay firm in the process and don’t be surprised if all of a sudden they change their tune and decide to totally freeze you out.
If they want to break up, Pisces is the type to write you a long letter about how they feel about you, and the entire saga of your romance. They can feel bad for breaking up with you—but you can beat them to the punch by writing the letter first. Pisces don’t like confrontation. If you try to catch a fish with your hands, they swim away super fast, so you have to let them know what the deal is in writing. They’ll romanticize your relationship until the end of time, but you can likely still be friends or maybe even hook up with each other again down the line. Pisces prefers if you keep an open line of communication so that you can support each other and validate confusing feelings through the process of breaking up.
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