Last month, hundreds of souls boarded Weezer Cruise, in which plenty of bands bloggable—DIIV! Toro Y Moi!—and not—Ozma? Ash?—played with Weezer, who've now solidified their dork cred by making an annual habit out of the dorkiest possible thing: Riding a boat named after yourself. I and you and plenty of other sad heart you know grew up a Weezer fan, so I won't say too much about the type of person willing to shell out hundreds of dollars for the privilege of attending, except that I probably would've tried to go had "I'll write about this cruise and how weird it is!" stopped being a viable pitch some 20 years ago. But try to imagine a boat jammed with the most diehard Weezer fans, proudly basking in the glory of the dork idols, singing along to "Buddy Holly" and pounding all the Heinekens in sight. It was probably a wonderful time.
Which brings us to the video above: An excited fan going up to Rivers Cuomo and attempting to rap battle him, much to Rivers' total blank surprise. It's so hard to watch. Did you try to watch it straight through? Haha, you total liar. It's beautiful, in a way, because only a Weezer fan could be so confident—whether he's intentionally taking the piss or blissfully unaware of how awkward he's being, you have to admire the chutzpah to do this, film this, and put it on the internet where anyone could find it. The comments on the video, sadly, are not so kind. Rivers, for his part, doesn't tell the guy to fuck off—because that would be rude, and because it would break the illusion of the Weezer Cruise as a place where dreams, no matter how painfully awkward, can come true.
Jeremy Gordon hopes this guy don't care what they'll say about him, anyway. He's on Twitter. - @jeremypgordon