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Cry-Baby of the Week

This week: A church canceled a funeral because they found out the deceased was gay and a woman allegedly attacked someone because her shorts were too short.

by Jamie Lee Curtis Taete
15 August 2014, 1:18pm

It's time, once again, to marvel at some idiots who don't know how to handle the world:

Cry-Baby #1: TW Jenkins

Julion Evans, Kendall Capers, and Pastor TW Jenkins. Screencaps via KSDK

The incident: A church found out that a man they were scheduled to hold a funeral for was gay.

The appropriate response: Nothing.

The actual response: They canceled the funeral. 

Last week, 42-year-old Julion Evans died of a condition called amyloidosis. He was due to be buried at New Hope Missionary Baptist Church in Tampa, Florida—a church that he and his family were members of. 

The day before the funeral was scheduled to take place, someone from the church called Julion's mother to tell her that the funeral was canceled. She received the call during Julion's wake, while she was standing over his coffin.

According to KSDK, the church canceled after noticing in Julion's obituary that he had been married to a man. 

TW Jenkins, pastor of New Hope, spoke with a reporter from the network and confirmed that they'd canceled the funeral because Julion was gay. "I try not to condemn anyone's lifestyle," he said. "But at the same time, I am a man of God and have to stand upon my principles." Which suggests TW could stand to try a little harder to not condemn lifestyles.

The pastor had also agreed to be interviewed on camera by KSDK, but refused to answer the door when a reporter went to speak to him. So maybe he's just kinda flaky when it comes to making plans. 

"Regardless of our background, our sexual orientation, how can you wait that long and put someone in a bind when they're going through a loss?" said Julion's widow, Kendall Capers. 

Julion's funeral instead took place at a nearby funeral home. He and Kendall had recently gotten married in Maryland. They had been a couple for 17 years. 

:(

Cry-Baby #2: Alicia Rae Hanson

A stock photo of some short shorts via Wikimedia Commons

The incident: A woman wore short shorts to a party.

The appropriate response: Nothing.

The actual response: Another woman beat the shit out of her.

Back in June, 25-year-old Alicia Rae Hanson was at a company barbecue organized by a tree service company in Snohomish, Washington.

According to court papers filed last week by Snohomish County prosecutors, Alicia was not too happy with the outfit being worn by an employee's girlfriend. 

Alicia is alleged to have confronted the woman about her shorts. According to court papers, she began "claiming that they were too short for the barbecue and acting in an aggressive manner." 

A few minutes later, Alicia allegedly ran up to the woman and punched her, knocking her to the ground. Witnesses say she then jumped on top of the victim, before repeatedly hitting her in the face and pulling her hair out. 

Onlookers pulled the two apart and called the police. According to a report in the town's local paper, police arrived to find "a pile of blond hair extensions on a table," which had been pulled from the victim's head.

Alicia was arrested and charged with felony second-degree assault. Her victim sustained broken facial bones and bleeding from her eye in the attack. 

At the time of press, no news reports mention how short the short shorts were.

Which of these guys is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll down here. Thanks.

Who is the bigger cry-baby?

Previously: A woman who cried because there was mold in her burger buns vs. a woman who called the cops because her son was watching porn

Winner: The porn mom!!!

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