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Cry-Baby of the Week: A Guy Called the Cops Because a Cat Ate His Bacon

Also this week: A man was banned from Starbucks for confronting people who were illegally parking in the store's handicapped parking space.

It's time, once again, to marvel at some idiots who don't know how to handle the world:

Cry-Baby #1: An unnamed man in Yorkshire, England

Photos via Pixabay and Wikimedia Commons

The incident: A man discovered his girlfriend had fed his bacon to a cat.

The appropriate response: Asking her not to do that, if it bothers you.

The actual response: He called the emergency services.

Earlier this week, West Yorkshire Police in England released several of the most ridiculous calls they've received to their 999 emergency number.

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The most ridiculous of these ridiculous calls (which you can listen to here) is a man who is calling to report his girlfriend for feeding his bacon to a cat.

The call opens with the caller saying, "Er, me girlfriend has let the cat eat my bacon."

"What would you like the police to do with regards to that, sir?" the operator asks. The man tells the operator that he wants to press charges. "Against who," the operator asks. "Your girlfriend, or the cat?"

After telling the operator that he wants to press charges against both his girlfriend and the cat, the man is told that it's not an arrestable offense to let a cat eat bacon, and also that the West Yorkshire Police does not arrest cats. The man then ends the call.

Other 999 calls released by the West Yorkshire force include a woman calling to report a pigeon in her house, someone calling to report that food they'd ordered wasn't very good, and a woman complaining that her neighbor's washing machine was too loud.

Speaking to the Yorkshire Evening Post, Tom Donahoe, who heads up West Yorkshire Police's team of 999 operators, said, "The serious point is that, a lot of the time, we're talking about a matter of seconds between us being able to get to a genuine emergency effectively and not being able to, and therefore having people's lives put at risk."

Tom also described a call they'd received in which a man asked for help figuring out who played the lead role in Magnum P.I. He did not specify whether or not the 999 operator had been able to help the guy out.

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Cry-Baby #2: A Starbucks manager in Tampa, Florida

Screencap via Google Maps

The incident: A man made a habit of confronting people who illegally park in the handicapped parking space outside his local Starbucks.

The appropriate response: Congratulating him.

The actual response: He was banned from Starbucks for life.

For the last few years, St. Petersburg, Florida, resident Rob Rowen (pictured above) has been confronting people who illegally park in the handicapped spot at the Starbucks he visits daily.

This is important to Rob, as his son-in-law has muscular dystrophy and, Rob says, often has difficulty finding parking. He told ABC News that while some customers he confronted would move politely, others complained to Starbucks staff.

Speaking to Tampa's WTSP 10 News, Rob described his confrontations with customers unhappy about being asked to move their cars. One man accused Rob of harassment after Rob took a photo of him and his car. In another incident, a woman called the police after Rob took a photo of her car parked in the handicapped space; according to Rob, she ended up getting a ticket for illegal parking, which he said "felt really good."

Then, a few months ago, another customer complained about being confronted Rob to the manager of the Starbucks. According to Rob, after this incident, the manager approached him and said, "I don't want you harassing my customers. I don't want you to come back in this store ever."

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A few days later, Rob received a letter from Starbucks. Initially, he thought the company was writing to apologize, but actually, the letter informed Rob that the ban had been extended to every single Starbucks in the world.

It reads, in part: "Starbucks requires that you leave its locations immediately and do not return. This expulsion notice is permanent and applies to all Starbucks locations."

After Rob's story started getting national media attention, though, a representative for Starbucks announced they were overturning the ban. "Mr. Rowen is welcome at any of our stores and we will work with him to improve the parking situation at this store and create better awareness and understanding of of the parking issue," a spokesman for the company said in an email to ABC News.

Who here is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this little poll down here:

Previously: A company who fired a toll booth operator for paying a customer's toll vs. some cops who arrested a woman for leaving her children unattended 30 feet away while she was being interviewed for a job.

Winner: The toll booth company!!!

Follow Jamie on Twitter.