How a Perth Hockey Team Got Sponsored By the World's Biggest Porn Site
Sport

How a Perth Hockey Team Got Sponsored By the World's Biggest Porn Site

Meet Two Girls One Puck, the women's roller hockey team that's sponsored by PornHub.
09 March 2017, 1:17am

If you sift through the recent photos on PornHub's Instagram account, it will look a little something like this: female porn star, female porn star, heaps of butts, dick pic memes, photo of a street roller hockey team from Perth. Obviously, one of these things is not quite like the others. The roller hockey team is called PerthHub: Two Girls One Puck—and recently it scored sponsored from PornHub, after the team sent off a "really average email" to the multi-million dollar company. The porn giants slung them a bunch of cash for uniforms and equipment, asking only for a photo of the players in their new jerseys in exchange.

"All they wanted from us was a team photo in our jerseys," says Maddy, a player and the team's marketing manager. "So basically, we convinced PornHub to pay women to put on clothes."

But how did the team get the attention of a company that gets hundreds of thousands of clicks a day? Is there any porn involved? (The answer to this one is a resounding: no). And what the hell is street roller hockey? "I literally wrote a message to PornHub saying, 'Hey, we're an all-girl roller hockey team in Perth. We think this would be a really good opportunity for you,'" explains Maddy. "'We'll give you exposure to a young local audience.'"

Street roller hockey kicked off in Perth in 2013, with just a few groups of mates falling over as they tried to push a puck around local tennis courts. By 2016, Perth boasted over 140 local teams, and leagues have begun in Melbourne and Sydney. "Basically, it's ice hockey on a field," says Maddy. Only four people play at once, the goals are generally a couple of milk crates, and there's no official padding. It's technically supposed to be a non-contact sport, and there are no goalkeepers. "There are no umpires either," says Bec, another Two Girls One Puck player. "You just have to be a good dude, basically. It's a bit street, a bit underground."

All photos by Daniel Martin

The women of Two Girls One Puck all started off playing in mixed teams, before deciding to join forces for the 2016 season after a big night out. "We're like the Mighty Ducks, but where you drink a few beers before you start playing," says Maddy. The team confirm that beverages are often on the agenda pre-and post-game, because "being on roller blades makes you a bit terrified, so a few beers take away the fear."

The seven players came up with PerthHub: Two Girls One Puck after some rather robust discussions with "basically no boundaries." Maddy designed the team jerseys, and sent the notorious email off to PornHub, "thinking they would send us a hilarious rejection letter that we could put on social media." The team didn't "desperately need" sponsorship, they were partially only doing it to one-up another team who were being sponsored by a local pizza joint. And they knew that if they pulled off the PornHub thing they would be underground heroes. "When they wrote back and said they were interested, we were really excited, but nobody believed us!" says Bec. "Seriously everyone thought we were lying until it went up on Instagram."

The team was terrified that they would be "ripped to shreds" after the Instagram photo was posted, but all they got was positivity—and a bunch of typically unsettling comments from creepy Internet dudes. "The funniest comment was the guy who was genuinely confused as to whether the team was legitimate or actually the cast of a porno," Maddy says. Other ace comments include declarations like: "Can I fuck u all" and "Girls DM for something big." Needless to say, they have not yet DM'd that dude.

Although they are sponsored by a company that gets their dough by oiling up attractive people and getting them to mash body parts, Two Girls One Puck are fairly indifferent to porn itself—and the entire situation is just pretty funny. "Porn is definitely not going anywhere any time soon, and we think it's just one of those things it's best to accept," says Maddy. The team's families have also been really pretty accepting of their daughters being sponsored the largest porn site on the internet. "They actually think its hilarious," says Bec. "Some parents even come to watch us sometimes, just like sport when you're a kid."

"The response has been really positive," agrees Maddy. "There are obviously some people who don't really understand why the team is named as it is or why we sought sponsorship but they aren't really our target audience; you can't please everyone!"

Despite all their self-deprecation, Two Girls One Puck were undefeated in the women's league in 2016—though, there was a small hiccup with the grand final. "We made it to the grand final; however, half of the team, including myself, booked a holiday on that date," says Maddy. "I flew back, but it didn't help—we lost."

"We were winning for the majority of the game, I swear," adds Bec—explaining they were playing in 45 degree weather. "Next season though. PornHub will be so proud."

Two Girls One Puck are gunning for the top of the women's league again in 2017, with their season starting in a few weeks. They plan to keep their purely platonic relationship with PornHub going. "We've got some good ideas for merchandise that we might hit them up about. We don't want to both them too much though, they are a professional business," Maddy says.

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