This article originally appeared on VICE Canada
Watching your two-month fling, long-term bae, or life-long spouse banging someone else has the potential to be pretty devastating, even if you’re a cuckold who—in principle—was completely up for smashing monogamy prior to the act itself. When one partner isn’t into cuckolding, it can go badly wrong. Even when two lovers think that they’re ready to cuckold, it can lead to regret.
But when a loving couple—full of confidence in their relationship and with fully-established consent—invite a third person to dine on their formerly-monogamous platter, it can be a mindblowingly transformative event. We asked a few happy cuckolds to share their first experiences with us.
Robbie*, 29, US, cuckolding for five years
“There were lots of early instances of her flirting with guys but I think the first hookup happened when she was in a hotel for work and made out with a co-worker that she had been flirting with. She had been teasing me that their sexual tension had been going strong, and then she finally told me it happened and it was a huge rush. There was a momentary feeling of jealousy or concern that we had gone too far—that we had made an irrevocable decision—but once she started texting me details I felt elated. It was like my (then) girlfriend [now fiancée] was a porn star. She was getting attention that I couldn’t give her because we were apart. And because she told me about it in detail, I felt very involved and there were no secrets.”
Harry*, 51, UK, cuckolding for three years
“The first guy we met was Mike*, he was about our age and it was supposed to be just a social meet, just to see if we could go through with it. We arranged a meet late one evening and we drove to a country park about 30 minutes away. We were both very nervous even though S* [my girlfriend] had drank a couple of glasses of wine before we set off. We parked in a lay-by where we waited for Mike. He pulled up about 10 minutes later and we sat talking, he seemed a decent guy—he was clean and quite well presented. I asked S if she wanted to see his cock and she said she did.
S got into his car, he got his cock out and then she lowered her head and took him in her mouth. I wasn’t expecting that. It was a strange feeling being stood at the driver’s side door watching the women you love sat in the passenger seat sucking some other guy off and having her tits played with. After what was probably a couple of minutes, but felt like ages, she pulled off him. He went to kiss her, but she turned away and that made me feel better—it was just sex, kissing would have been too far for me I think. S looked me in the eyes and said kiss me. What could I do? I knelt down and kissed her, she gave me a very passionate kiss and I could taste his cock on her lips.
She pulled away from our kiss, looked down at his hard cock, looked at me and she then said to me “suck it.” I lowered my head and took him in my mouth, it felt good, both physically and mentally, to be knelt there sucking a cock in front of my girlfriend/mistress. Then she lowered her head again and joined me in sucking him.
Here we were, in a country park, sucking a stranger’s cock together, it was crazy. Mike never got to cum that night but on the drive home S was very wound up, she came very quickly as I rubbed her pussy, she even sucked my cock as I drove, she was obviously very horny. When we got home we talked about what had happened and had a very satisfying love-making session that night. We never hooked up with Mike again, but that night was the beginning of a new chapter in our relationship.
Did I get jealous? Very, but that’s part of it.
Would we do it again? Yes, we have.
Was it scary? Hell yes, this could have gone either way, completely wrecking our relationship—we love each other very much, it would destroy me to lose her.
Would we recommend it to other couples? That depends on the couple, we discussed it for about six months before we met Mike. You have to be extremely confident in your relationship together otherwise this could easily blow your whole world apart.”
Nick*, 44, US, cuckolding for 15 years
“The first time I watched my wife drive away, knowing that she would be sleeping with another man, was a complicated experience, but that's the draw of cuckolding—it's complicated with multiple emotions layered over one another and pulling in different directions. I felt sick to my stomach with anxiety, but was also excited to hear about the details later. She called the next morning with details that ignited my imagination and desires, and I met her at the door with flowers—we both spent a long time afterwards alternating between sharing our excitement for this new path and reconnecting with one another.
The first time I knew she would be having unprotected sex with one of her lovers, it was difficult again. I worried about losing that last thing that was just for us alone, but also incredibly excited for everything this new path offered. I kept an eye on the clock, knowing what was likely happening as the evening passed ("she's feeling his bare cock enter her for the first time," "he's probably already cum in her by now," "they're out to dinner by now, and my wife is feeling his cum dripping out of her as she sits at the restaurant table"). I would alternate between almost having a panic attack and being insanely turned on.
The first time I assisted her lover as a 'true' cuckold was a very freeing experience for me. Knowing I didn't have to be in control was a relief to me. I could watch as another man roughly used my wife and see how much she responded to it. I know that modern animal behaviorists have denounced our understandings of wolfpack power dynamics, but it best describes how I feel. I'm not looking to be an omega in my pack, but I'm not really an alpha either. However, it feels right to be the beta—loving and caring for my wife while someone with more drive holds a degree of power over both of us.”
Owen*, 25, US, cuckolding for two years
“My first cuckolding experience was in senior year of high school with my ex-girlfriend who cucked me for a couple years (all parties were 18, don't worry). There was this guy she was flirting with prior to me dating her, but they never happened. He was much more of an alpha even though—and it’s cringe to say this—I was more popular than him. So one day they ended up talking and I asked my girlfriend if she still liked him. She said ‘yes’ and then long story short, a couple weeks later it was the day she was going to hang out with him outside of school. I was super nervous that day, butterflies in my stomach. I didn't eat much, but I was super aroused. I walked her halfway to where his car was. Kissed her goodbye and she went on her way. We didn't really have texting back then, so I went home for a couple hours. A masturbated so much thinking about what was happening.
Later she called and told me how at first they didn't do much. She said to him if they wanted to do anything then he had to make a move. So he told her to show him her breasts and then gave him a blowjob. She said he was huge. Emotionally, I felt a little dirty and upset. Then my body took over and I was immediately aroused. Especially after she told me his dick size. Knowing that he was large extremely aroused me. I think I am more of a beta. Knowing that he was more dominant and bigger than me made me feel like a real cuckold, who should just serve.
This was my first experience with cuckolding—it’s got more explicit as the years have gone by.”
*Names have been changed.