Oldchella Is Going to Kick So Much Ass

This festival features The Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, Paul McCartney, Neil Young, Roger Waters, and The Who, and it's gonna rule so hard.

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03 May 2016, 2:55pm

Do you have a dad in your life? Are you, at this present moment, a father of any sort? Do you think the idea of going to the desert locale of Coachella sounds fun but think those EDM DJs should learn a real instrument for a change? Most importantly, do you like REAL ROCK? If yes to any of these, good, because your ass is about to be kicked harder than it ever has been. Behold: Desert Trip.

Have you collected your ass off the floor yet? According to the video above, Desert Trip promises “three nights of PURE HONEST ESSENTIAL EPIC TRUE LOUD REAL ROCK. AND. ROLL” out in the California desert. Honest, true and real? This is clearly the greatest music festival and lineup ever. Every artist here is a Great Maker of Classic Rock Music. The Rolling Stones? Genius pioneers of REAL ROCK. Bob Dylan? He wrote that one song Jimi Hendrix covered! Paul McCartney? He worked with Kanye! The Who are legends and Roger Daltrey and Pete Townshend are still graceful, powerful REAL ROCK performers. Just look at them:


HONEST.

Pink Floyd may be no more, but Roger Waters is still here through sheer pigheadedness. And of course who can forget the mythical Neil Young? He made Pono!

So yeah, unless you hate REAL ROCK (which makes you totes lame), you're gonna go to this. Oldchella will definitely be the most EPIC and ESSENTIAL music festival of all time.

Phil Witmer has seen half of these guys in concert multiple times already. Follow him on Twitter.