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Danny, who's with him, is just over five feet tall in a shiny gray suit, friendly, and keen to chat. He works as a supervisor on a building site and has come down after clocking off, hoping to meet new friends. He's pretty fresh to all of this, apparently."I'm just starting to go to events, find my feet," he says.And what kind of fetish partner is he hoping to find tonight?"I'm just looking for a girl who'll kick the fuck out of me," he says.A bell rings, meaning it's time for the men to take their places at tables set out in a private area of the bar. Sitting there with my name badge on, I feel more like I'm at a group interview for an Asda checkout job than a quick-fire fetishist meet and greet."I'm just looking for a girl who'll kick the fuck out of me."
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Laura, who appears to have drunk enough booze for everyone else in there, is more forthcoming about her interests."I love dungeons," she slurs. "And I love blood."Blood?"It's really sexy. It's a turn-on. I don't scar easily. I like blood all over the place."Another woman who's not shy about her tastes is Samantha."I'm into extreme cock and ball torture," she says. "Extreme," she emphasizes.My toes curling involuntarily, I ask if it's dangerous."Yeah."How dangerous?"I like staple-gun play."Right."And castration, if you want."Seriously?"Well, if you wanted. Legalities aside."READ ON MOTHERBOARD: The Fetish for Video Game Characters Trapped in QuicksandAnd what does she do when she's not lacerating guys' scrotums?"I'm a surgeon," she says. She sniffs and looks around. "You know the problem with these events? There are no real fetishists here."By the end of the night I feel like I've got a pretty good sense of the capital's visible kinky interests, at least among its women. Those interests are, while not exactly mainstream, not quite as unique as I'd expected: the majority fall into either the sub or dom category, which—considering the past decade of films like Secretary, Nymphomaniac, and Fifty Shades of Grey—the general public is already well-acquainted with. Of course, there were some exponents of the more fringe elements nestled in there.As I'm on my way out, I bump into Danny and ask how his night went."Good," he says, and pauses. "But there are a few in here tonight where I thought, Woah, that's a bit hardcore."All names have been changed.Follow John on Twitter."I'm into extreme cock and ball torture," says Samantha. "Extreme."