I Hadn't Seen My Addict Father in Years—Then I Ran Into Him on the Street
I spotted my dad hanging out in a sketchy alley in my hometown. He didn't even recognize me when I introduced myself.
What Everyone Does When They're Bored at Work
When you’re bored and underpaid, sometimes taking a long dump is the only respite.
What I Learned at the 'Debate' Between Jordan Peterson and Slavoj Žižek
Žižek was less a cognizant thinker and more a pathological sacred cow tipper while Peterson was a bard for the reactionary elite and emo as hell.
Views My Own
Now That I Know the World is Doomed, Should I Get Into Advertising?
I’ve marched against climate change. I’ve read Naomi Klein. What else can I do?
I Thought I Had Herpes for Two Years
I really should have gotten a second opinion.
All the Bonkers, Evil Shit I Saw at a Wealth Expo Featuring Sylvester Stallone
I was sad because this cult of money shit works. Then Pitbull showed up.
The Ultimate Haunted House Tour For the 21st Century Human
Prepare to be horrified.
A Guide to Being an Average Student by a Perfectly Average Student
Take it from me, I owe $45,000 to the government and I tell jokes for a job.
Bacon Won’t Save You: A Semi-Scientific Guide to the Best Hangover Cures
Some of these might come in handy.
The Guilt of the Oldest Brother
I couldn’t protect my brothers from my dad, so what good was I?
What Happened When I Used an App to Try to Cure My Premature Ejaculation Issues
Yes, I gamified all my shameful orgasms.
I Watched Eight Hours of Steven Seagal Movies to Understand America
What does the 90s' mumbling, fourth-rate action star say about the country and me?