It's time, once again, to marvel at some idiots who don't know how to handle the world:
Cry-Baby #1: Shaneka Torres
The incident: McDonald's didn't put bacon on a woman's bacon cheeseburger. Twice.
The appropriate response: Complaining. Twice.
The actual response: She fired a gun into the restaurant.
Last month, Shaneka Torres (pictured above) and an unnamed friend ordered bacon cheeseburgers from a McDonald's in Grand Rapids, Michigan.
Staff at the restaurant messed up the order, giving Shaneka and her friend regular cheeseburgers. Shaneka complained to a manager at the restaurant, who told her that she and her friend could get free bacon cheeseburgers on their next visit. So far, so good.
They returned later that night, and, once again, asked for bacon cheeseburgers. And, again, they were served cheeseburgers without bacon. Shaneka was super not into this.
According to a report on the local ABC affiliate, Shaneka yelled at a worker, before pulling out a pistol and firing one round into the restaurant from her car.
The bullet shattered her car window, and passed through the restaurant " at about head level" without hitting anyone.
Shaneka was arrested shortly after at her home. She was charged with carrying a concealed weapon, discharging a firearm into a building, and felony use of a firearm.
She appeared in court yesterday, where a jury took less than an hour finding her guilty. She will be sentenced next month, and could face up to seven years in prison.
No word on why the fuck the staff at that McDonald's have such difficulty putting bacon on cheeseburgers.
Cry-Baby #2: An unnamed 12-year-old
The incident: A woman confiscated her daughter's iPhone.
The appropriate response: Sucking it up until you're old enough to buy your own iPhone.
The actual response: The girl allegedly attempted to kill her mother.
According to a report on Denver's Fox 31, on an unspecified date, an unnamed woman seized the iPhone of her unnamed daughter for unknown reasons.
Some unspecified amount of time after this, the mother drank a smoothie. As she did so, she reportedly noticed that it smelled of bleach. "She thought that her daughter had maybe just cleaned the glass and that there was still bleach left in it," said commander Heidi Prentup of the Boulder County Sherriff's Office. After finishing the smoothie, the woman is reported to have gotten sick.
According to police, the mother realized that the bleach was not accidental a couple of days later, when she drank from a glass of water that also smelled of bleach.
The mother confronted her daughter, who allegedly confessed that she was trying to kill her. "She said that she had wanted to kill her mother because she had taken her iPhone from her," commander Heidi said.
The daughter has been arrested on two counts of attempted murder. The mother did not ingest enough of the bleach for it to be life-threatening.
Which of these folks is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll down here:
Winner: The amputee-hater!!!
Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Twitter.