This tweet sent a very small but defined subsection of Twitter, affectionately known as Weird Sports Twitter, into fits. Many people, including both of us, mocked the image of a middle-aged man bursting into a restaurant and berating the host with news of a death until he cried.My first question to you: is this the greatest tweet of all time?Sean Newell:BRONX, NEW YORK-- This is a tough question. There are a lot of great tweets out there. A random search reveals just as much. But "Greatest tweet of all time," that's serious. And this is unquestionably the greatest tweet of all time. What kind of psychopath tweets something like that? Actually, let's back up. What kind of psychopath has this interaction with a complete stranger regarding the untimely passing of another human being and then tweets that exact interaction like he was writing a screenplay? Who does this??The answer of course is Peter King. Peter King does this because he is an anthropomorphic rolodex/voice recorder/word processor. There is no humanity to Peter King, because he is merely a conduit for information. This serves PeteBot2K15 well when he is working as the NFL's water mule, but it crosses him up when he ventures too far into the real world. The gears and springs whirring inside him begin to overheat and all of sudden there's a little implosion and he recklessly breaks news of the passing of a beloved actor to some poor waiter. "Thought he would cry." Peter might as well have said "I am human because I recognize the human emotions of others."MILWAUKEE-Asked restaurant host: "God, did you hear about Robin Williams?"Host: "No."Me: "Died. He killed himself."Thought he would cry.
— Peter King (@SI_PeterKing) August 12, 2014
MILWAUKEE -Called my neighbor: "Is your refrigerator running?"him: "Yes."Me: "Well you better catch it….BEFORE IT DIES."
— Sean Newell (@dontforgetmac) August 12, 2014
INT. ELEVATORPeter King presses all the buttons. Doors close, elevator moves, doors open. Peter: (Shouts) ROBIN WILLIAMS IS DEAD!
— Aaron W. Gordon (@A_W_Gordon) August 12, 2014
Host: How many in your party?Peter King: Have you seen this Youtube of a kitten on fire?Host: *pukes*King: I thought you were metal, man.
— Big Sexy Jeb! Lund (@Mobute) August 12, 2014
Aaron Gordon:This wasn't really a debate. It seems we're in complete agreement that this is the greatest tweet of all time. Should we argue about something?Sean Newell:Hmm, we could argue about whether off-field conduct should matter when voting for the Pro Football Hall of Fame.Peter King: [throws a grenade into a schoolbus]Everyone: [screams]Grenade: [pops, revealing a banner reading ROBIN WILLIAMS DEAD U GUYS]
— Albert Burneko (@AlbertBurneko) August 12, 2014