Fresh off its biggest security disaster of all time, Apple is announcing its new cellular telephones Tuesday from Steve Jobs Theater in Cupertino, California. We could not arrange for a news chopper to get live aerial footage of the event. But we do have YouTube and will be watching as Tim Cook, Phil Schiller, and some other folks tell us about the iPhone 11 and probably some other goods and services from Apple Inc.
We will be updating this post throughout the event. But for now, in the minutes leading up to "show time," excitement is high at VICE HQ, where staffers are anxiously awaiting the new devices. Take it from them:
Tim Marchman, Editorial Director, Features: "I have a 6s Plus and they'll pry it out of my dead hands. Unless the new one has a headphone jack, in which case I think it sounds great and I'm going to get one."
Casey Johnston, Editorial Director, Life: "I hope it's good, and not bad."
Caroline Haskins, Staff Writer, Motherboard: "Not sure what that is sorry."
Edward Ongweso Jr, Staff Writer, Motherboard: "My dream iPhone? Something I can actually tinker with and replace parts for and doesn't cost $1,000 bucks."
Amy Rose Spiegel, Senior Editor, Life: "There's a new iPhone."
Jason Koebler, Editorial Director, Motherboard: "Look at my camera."
The iPhone 11 livestream is starting any moment and so will this live blog!
Update 1:08 PM EDT: There's a guy on stage playing Frogger on Apple’s upcoming video game subscription service Apple Arcade. Konami and Capcom are early partners. It's gaming, on an iPad. Or an iPhone. Also, look at this guy's fedora:
Update 1:13 PM EDT: Apple Arcade costs $4.99 a month, which is a little cheaper than GameFly, which lets you play games on things that are not an iPad. Tim Cook is now talking about Apple TV+, the company's Netflix competitor announced earlier this year with many dozens of celebrities. Tim Cook says that trailers for its shows have been watched more than 100 million times, which is one-fifth as many views as PewDiePie has in the last month.
Update: 1:16 PM EDT: Apple is showing trailers of movies and TV shows right now and not iPhones, so let's see what some experts have to say about iPhones. From press releases that have shown up in our inboxes:
“Apple moves from offense to defense in its anticipated launch today. The incremental level of innovation in the iPhone 11 lineup is a sign of a broader problem for Apple. Not only is Apple running out of innovative ideas for the iPhone, but the whole smartphone category has matured to the point that innovation and sales may have peaked," Mohan Sawhney, a professor at Northwestern University's Kellogg School of Business said.
“Recently, pro-democracy protesters from Hong Kong leveraged Apple’s Airdrop technology during protests to great success. At the same time, in mainland China, Tibetan activists and Uyghur families continue to face persecution for their political activities online – which Apple refuses to protect them from,” Reem Suleiman, Senior Campaigner at SumOfUs, said.
“We’ve seen Apple technology leveraged with varying impacts to free expression and democracy just in the past few months,” Sondhya Gupta, Campaign Manager at SumOfUs said. “For this reason, we, along with Apple shareholders, implore the company to take a look at the bigger human rights picture in countries and territories such as China, Tibet and East Turkestan where freedom of expression is constantly suppressed.”
Update: 1:19 PM EDT: Apple TV+ will cost $4.99 per month and if you buy a new iPhone you get a year for free. Everyone cheers!
Update: 1:23 PM EDT: There's a new iPad! With 3.5 million pixels. Which Apple points out is way more than the average PC laptop, which they imply looks like garbage compared to this "magical piece of glass that can become anything you want it to be."
Update: 1:27 PM EDT: Apple says that the new iPad's enclosure is made of "100 percent recycled aluminum" to "expand our environmental achievements." This is a statement that means essentially nothing, because recycling aluminum is easy and recycling other metals inside the iPad or iPhone is difficult. There's much more to a device than its enclosure. Buying a new iPhone or iPad or any other electronic remains, as it's always been, bad for the planet.
Update: 1:35 PM EDT: Apple just played a long video about how the Apple Watch is saving a bunch of lives. It followed that by announcing that the company will be launching three health research studies. It did not explain how people's privacy would be protected, or how this data would be collected or shared, or anything like that. Apple is too smart to be flippant with people's health data, one would think, but it's still alarming the company didn't address it. Anyways, here are the studies:
The new Apple Watch is "always on" and it "never sleeps." The new watch has a "low temperature, poly silicon tactile display," which sounds like it's more-or-less like e-Ink but in color.
Update: 1:47 PM: TIM IS TALKING ABOUT THE PHONES! New phone is coming :)
Update: 1:51 PM: Look at all these people tweeting when they could be living in the moment.
The new phone has a better camera and apparently better sound. It also lets you take "ultra wide" photos, which look pretty cool. In all seriousness, Apple has been getting its ass kicked by the Google Pixel's camera, which has emphasized software over hardware. The new iPhone seems to be trying to catch up to this, as it has a new "night mode," which sounds like the Pixel's "Night Sight."
This article originally appeared on VICE US.