Two High Schools in New York Are Accusing Each Other of Racism over a Basketball Game

Welcome to another edition of This Week in Racism. I’ll be ranking news stories on a scale of one to RACIST, with “one” being the least racist and “RACIST” being the most racist.

–Three students at Mahopac High School in Mahopac, New York, were suspended for sending racist tweets to basketball players from Mount Vernon High School after they lost to them in a semi-final playoff game. As the above video of a fight between rival fans shows, tensions were already high at the game, and that spilled over to the post-game tweets. The Lower Hudson Journal News reported that the tweets referred to Mount Vernon residents as "monkeys" and quoted one particular tweet that said, "One of the few biological Mount Vernon fathers just tried to sell me crack outside the county center." At least he's working, right fellas????? Ahem.

The two school district superintendents are now engaged in their own flame war over how best to punish those involved. Mount Vernon superintendent of schools Judith Johnson wants the Mahopac varsity basketball team suspended for one year. Mahopac superintendent Thomas Manko told the Journal News that Johnson's suggestion was "excessive." Manko wants Johnson to look into allegations that Mount Vernon fans hit a Mahopac cheerleader in the head and threatened to pull her hair. Also, he claims Mahopac players were heard saying, "White boys can't play basketball." While all of this childish horseshit was going on, Mount Vernon rivalry as "healthy" and "competitive." Rumor has it that Manko is also really pulling for Chris Brown and Rihanna to "make it work."

Let's all take a second to remember that this is about high school athletics and that grown adults are arguing about a game played by children. If kids playing sports gets you worked up enough to get into a fight or behave in a racist fashion, maybe you should take a second to reconsider your life choices. Or consider a job in AM radio. RACIST

–Apparently, if you want to find stories about people being racist these days, there's no better source than America's mismanaged, dismal public school system. It's also a great place to get Z-grade prison food and chicken pox, but I digress.

An investigation is underway after it was alleged that a substitute teacher at Kraft Meadows Middle School in Caldonia, Michigan, singled out students for racially motivated verbal abuse. The teacher, whose name was not revealed, is said to have used that darned N-word among other ethnic, religious, or cultural slurs. Carri Briggs, the mother of a student who witnessed the incident, told Grand Rapids TV station WOOD (yes, that's an acronym for the station), "There is absolutely no incident whatsoever that you can call a person the N-word for anything. There just isn’t." Yeah, but what if they cut you off on the freeway or offer you government-subsidized health care? RACIST

–ATTENTION: RACISTS, HOMOPHOBES, CROOKED COPS, AND ALEC BALDWIN. Pretty much everyone in the United States and Canada has A camera phone now. I know it's hard to accept that the average citizen possesses a tiny, magic device in his or her pocket that can capture and record you doing something antisocial. They've been popular for a few years now. You can also play games like Snake, Minesweeper, and solitaire on them!

A clerk at a Sears department store in Winnipeg, Manitoba, was filmed by one of these futuristic tools while slanging racism at an Asian customer. After asking the customer to remove his child from a lawnmower on the display floor, the clerk took things a step further by asking the man if he just "came off the boat.” To say that the customer "took offense" to that comment would be a gross understatement. He lost his shit and demanded the clerk be fired. The clerk was fired on Monday, since whoops, there was evidence of his infraction. Maybe we should all just assume there's a camera on us at all times and behave accordingly.

Of course, that hasn't made the Kardashians any less annoying, so never mind.  RACIST

The Most Racist Tweets of the Week:

Just because I have chink eyes doesn't mean I'm Asian #HispanicProbz

— Hi, I'm Rad As Fuck (@AyoooCory_) March 7, 2014

If only we had a Deporter in Chief. We wouldn't be Wetback Nation. #tcot @cspanwj #teaparty

— Va. Texan ☆ (@VaTxn) March 7, 2014

The sitar is the sand nigger banjo.

— THE DEVIL (@NOIRFANCY) June 11, 2013

This is my 2nd Russian Jew room mate , there mad rude and annoying

— M (@Michelledavith0) March 7, 2014

✨ Annie was a freckled face redhead, not a nappy head parasite infected #nigger shitbag! #niggers ruin everything!! pic.twitter.com/oJTbVkMrn1

— Bum Farto (@Bum_Farto) March 7, 2014

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