Well hot damn. Baseball is back, baby. More importantly, Chicago Cubs center fielder Ian Happ is back and out here murdering balls like he's got a get-out-of-jail card.
On the first fucking pitch of the first fucking game of the 2018 MLB season, Happ settled into the batter's box, waiting on a pitch from Miami Marlins pitcher José Ureña—and he did not waste any time swinging the lumber. He turned on the first pitch he saw and smoked it into right field for a home run. Feast your eyes:
And the Cubs were on top of their Twitter game about it:
Meanwhile, in Chicago:
Get a towel, Michael. It's 32 degrees in Chicago right now.
UPDATE: 2:00 PM
Cubs first baseman Anthony Rizzo also got in on the action with a dinger of his own:
Rizzo, of course, returned to his home state of Florida today and before the game, the Cubs came out wearing shirts in support of his alma mater, Marjory Stoneman Douglas, after the horrific school shooting in Parkland, Florida on February 14.
Before the game, Rizzo came out and made a personal statement about Stoneman Douglas, advocating for gun reform. Per the Chicago Tribune:
“I think the nation is listening. I think there are some politicians that are maybe shaking a little bit, a little nervous. But you’ve got to keep going.”
“In a perfect word, make it stricter,” he said. “Make background checks a little harder to get these guns. I think it’s a little too easy to go in there and get a gun. I think the entire nation can agree on that.”
Seems like our good friend Michael made good on his word to go for a dip:
Poor bastard. That'll learn him to bet against his precious Cubs.
This article originally appeared on VICE Sports US.