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I'm Psychic... with Jon Glaser

I think foot rubs would be good.

Jon Glaser is the creator and star of Delocated!, which he also co-writes. He has also appeared on or written for basically every funny show that exists on any network, so I can’t list all those. Put it like this: He’s really funny!

The first time we scheduled this interview, I didn’t have a cable I needed, and when I explained this to him—at the time we were supposed to be doing the interview—he said it was no big deal. I apologized again, and, switching into the voice of an idiotic, rich, powerful man who is angry but trying to control his temper, he said, “Well, there’s just the abject stupidity of it.” I got the joke, but couldn’t keep up with him, so just said, “Well, it is!” Still in this voice, he said, “You know, we’re not even gonna go into that. Let’s just… move on.”

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What I am trying to say is that Glaser is really funny, in this subtle way. But you know that. If you ever get the chance to see Midnight Pajama Jam, if he ever does that again, you must go. But enough of this.

VICE: So, what kind of reading would you like to do? Maybe one on editing?
Jon Glaser: We can do whatever. The edit is almost over. I have one sound mix left and two color corrects. Technically it’s not over, but the editing is basically done. We can do, “Is the show going to get picked up?”

This will be the fourth season, right?
The fourth season, yeah. Is that you shuffling cards?

Yeah.
I was trying to figure out what that sound was. Then I realized it was cards.

Are you pretty confident it’s going to get picked up? The cards are saying you are.
We can keep it vague. Like, what's next? So it encompasses everything, maybe so it’s not so specific to the show? That might open it up more.

That's a good idea.
Let's do that. Does that mean you have to reshuffle?

Yeah, I shuffle again. Are you off now for a while?
Sort of. I still have about another week left of work, with sound mixes and color correction and other things going on. At the end of next week I'll be a lot less busy. I think for the rest of March I'm just going to lay low. I'm pretty fried from the show. It's great. I'm happy to be so tired and so busy, but, I don't know if I mentioned, we adopted a baby, my wife and I, and it happened literally a day after we wrapped the shoot.

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A boy or a girl?
A girl. So I've just been completely exhausted from work and now being back to being sleep deprived.

That's so great though.
Yeah, it's all great things. No complaints. I feel so fortunate to be so busy and so exhausted. Doing the show is completely full time.

Yeah, these cards say you should take a break from work.
Yeah. I feel like I need it. I'm going to get some foot rubs. What do the cards say about foot rubs?

Actually, that sounds like a good idea. In the near future you have the Lovers card, which probably has to do with your wife.
What is it? The lover card?

The Lovers. It's a good card. There are a couple cards about love, but this one is the best. I think foot rubs would be good. Let me go through and make sure I understand all of these. Yeah, it tells you not to worry about money and achieving results and any of that kind of stuff. Don't even think about it. Don't even think about being inspired. Just relax. It says to have fun.
Ha ha. That seems pretty accurate. That's exactly what's on my mind.

There's also the World card, which is really happy and really positive, so I think it's just saying this is a good time to do that. It's encouraging you.  And you have the Fool card, which is telling you just not to worry. And we're almost to the end.
Is that a baby I'm hearing in the background?

No, it's a dog downstairs.
A dog?

A hound dog. It just bays all day and the neighbors yell at it to shut up.
So you're hearing a dog and then, "Shut up"?

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Yes, but I don't even hear it anymore. But that's what that is. OK, its advice to you is to think of yourself and be kind of selfish and just take care of yourself.
I like that! I'll focus on me. Next week, I told someone at the network, when I wrap the edit, I'm just doing naps and spa treatments. She jokingly said, "Are you going to get a hotel room?" That would be the worst, if I told my wife, "I'm getting a hotel in the city, just pretend I'm gone."

Ha. Don’t call me! But actually, it wouldn't be a bad idea to get one with her, according to these.
We talked about that, maybe just getting a hotel in Manhattan. I think it would be fun, go to a show, get some dinners. But it’s harder with two kids, and we have a dog. She needs a lot of care because her back legs are going out on her.

The last card says if you genuinely relax you'll feel more inspired, and you’re going to have just a lot, a lot of opportunities–just like an open field, many choices. And that’s it. Do you have any questions?
Was that it?

Yes. It's a short interview.
As long as you feel like you got enough, that's fine.

It's a light thing. I'm OK with it.
Then I'm fine with it. I have got to get off the phone and take care of myself and book some foot rubs. Maybe I'll go get one right now.

Previously - I'm Psychic… with Mary Gaitskill

@barrodale