Sick Pythons

Alfonso Soriano Looks Like He Ate Another Alfonso Soriano

Retirement from sports has been a great opportunity for the man to exercise more.

by Liam Daniel Pierce
Sep 20 2017, 4:08pm

Screen capture via MLB/Photo via Flickr Commons 

It's hard to tell exactly what Alfonso Soriano has been eating lately, but the man looks like he just became siamese twins with himself. At 41 years of age, he looks more like the Barry Bonds everyone remembers than the Soriano everyone remembers. Last night as the Chicago Cubs visited the Tampa Bay Rays, the camera panned to the former Cub (and Ranger and National and Yankee), and I'm surprised anyone in the booth recognized him.

Just take a peek:

Take that man to the vet, because those pythons are siiiiiick. According to CSN Cubs beat reporter Patrick Mooney, he apparently runs into his former manager Lou Piniella at least a few times a week.

Seems like "a few" is an understatement. Anyway, just take a look at what Soriano looked like in 2006:

Like a pair of chopsticks propping up a T-shirt. Photo from Flickr user Scott Ableman

Maybe he's just been wearing oversized T-shirts all this time?