A Smiling Serial Shitter Is Terrorizing Toronto

UPDATE: Police have made an arrest.

A serial shit thrower appears to be on the loose in Toronto.

Toronto police are looking for a man allegedly behind three separate diarrhea attacks that have taken place in the last week. In each instance, the man rolled up on unsuspecting people, dumped a bucket of “liquefied fecal matter” on them and took off.

The most recent attack took place Monday night outside of a University of Toronto building near College Street and University Avenue. Police said a man approached a woman on the sidewalk, dumped a bucket of feces on her, and ran off. The man was described as a Black male in his 30s with a medium build who was wearing a yellow hard hat, a blue shirt, and gloves. He reportedly left behind his orange Home Depot bucket, which housed the feces.

The bucket was also left at the scene of the other two incidents.

On Nov. 22, a man dumped a bucket of feces over the head of a man who was sitting inside the Robarts Library at the University of Toronto. He also unloaded feces on a woman there, police said.

Speaking to CityNews, an eyewitness said at first they didn’t know what was in the contents of the bucket—but then the dank odour set in.

“The smell hit like two minutes later and it was a really foul smell,” he said. “It’s something like if you were working at a construction site, you know one of those mobile bathrooms, and you just went in there like a very concentrated feces-like smell.”

The witness said the man “poured everything” out of what looked to be a 20-litre bucket.

“I was definitely traumatized, very disgusted by this very lowly act.”

Just two days later, the pooper struck again at York University’s Scott Library.

At around 5 PM, a man entered the library with a bucket, and poured liquefied feces onto an unsuspecting man sitting at a table before fleeing. Security cameras captured images of the suspect, who is described as a Black male with a medium build. If you study the images, the suspect appears to be grinning broadly as he carries a bucket covered by a piece of fabric.

Toronto police spokesman Victor Kwong said the suspect didn’t say anything during the attacks.

“It was dump and run.” He said police don’t yet know the man’s motives.

Kwong said the victims are “obviously disgusted.”

He said police can’t provide advice on how to protect oneself from being the victim of this type of poop bomb.

“There’s absolutely nothing we could ever say to someone who is trying to go about their everyday business to prevent something like this from happening.”

Kwong said forensics teams are examining the bucket from Monday night to determine if it did indeed contain feces. He can’t say whether or not the victims are at risk of disease until those results come back.

Kwong said the incidents are being investigated as assaults, but they could also fall under the Mental Health Act depending on the circumstances. He said the latter has been in the case with similar incidents in the past.

Police chief Mark Saunders told CP24 the shit attacks are “serious offences.”

“If you can identify that person, please call us and let us know. There definitely will be an apprehension,” he said.

Until then, we suggest avoiding campus libraries.

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