Writing about depression is hard. More often than not, it mens writing about the absence of feeling, leaving a writer with few if any of the usually-essential senses to bounce off of. That's one of the reasons that Julien Baker's "Appointments," the first single from her forthcoming Turn Out the Lights LP, is so absorbing. It's a vivid and detailed account of a person's inability to see any sort of emotional redemption, or the ability to actually feel anything at all.
The album's title track came out this morning and it follows a similar sonic path: simple, plucked electric chords, gentle melodies, and an exorcizing burst at the end when the guitars build up and Baker's vocals kick up an octave. Lyrically, though, it's more of a real-time interpretation of a spiralling thought-process. It's less linear than "Appointments," but no less affecting for it. "So why is it easy for everyone else?" Baker asks before moving straight on: " I'm not always like this / There's always tomorrow i guess." And that big, cathartic burst at the end actually does reach some kind of resolution. "When I turn out the lights / There's no one left / Between myself and me." It's a short term fix, but it's something more than meds.
Watch the video for the song above. It's directed by Sophia Peer, who also took on the "Appointments" video.
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