According to a report out of Georgia, police responded to a 911 call from a convenience store clerk complaining of a man walking into the store and exposing himself. As it turns out, that man was former Atlanta Falcons running back Jamal Anderson. Apparently he was dropped off at the store and tried just giving money to the clerk, who did not understand anything he was saying. He walked around the store for some time and then exposed himself and allegedly started masturbating. You might think Anderson was having a bad trip or something, but then you haven't read one of the better utterances of 2016, courtesy of Suwanee police Captain Shane Edmisten:
"There was nothing out of the ordinary, outside of him masturbating in the store," Edmisten said.
According to police, Anderson appeared intoxicated, but he was cooperative and the clerk did not want to press charges, so he was issued a warning for trespassing. Oh, and he is banned from the convenience store, which is probably a good idea.