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The Jerkoff Diaries
My back hurts. My eyes are dry. And my neck is tighter than my asshole. The only thing more embarrassing than blogging (BLOGGING!) about trying to stop masturbating is blogging about being constipated from not masturbating.
Christopher Lucas
10.19.12
Question Of The Day

If You Could Eliminate One Bodily Function, What Would It Be?
We asked the fine people of Toronto what bodily function they would eliminate, if they could choose one to get rid of. Apparently, crying is better than ejaculating and snot is grosser than poop.
Sam Zaret
10.19.12
Ask A Lawyer

Ask A Lawyer - Is Chief Keef Going To Jail?
Our legal counsel offers his take.
10.19.12
Features

Pimp Rap Has a New Prince and his Name is 100s
He's 19, half-Jewish, and he recently escaped out of a terrible boarding school in the Ivory Coast.
Wilbert Cooper
10.19.12
Motherboard Blog

Real-Life Confessional Boards Are Just As Awkward and Gross As Reddit
Walking through an urban college campus can be an extremely claustrophobic experience. With ever-increasing enrollment are one factor, there are the young and eagerly participatory students, destined to have you join a club or support a cause. "Buy a...
Daniel Stuckey
10.19.12
SuperUber

[Exclusive] The Making Of Beyoncé's "I Was Here" Performance For World Humanitarian Day 2012
Beyoncé gave a tearjerker of a performance at the United Nations for World Humanitarian Day. We spoke with Kenzo Digital, SuperUber and Dirt Empire about what went into making this multimedia spectacle.
Julia Kaganskiy
10.19.12
SuperUber

The Technology Behind Beyoncé's World Humanitarian Day 2012 Performance
For Beyoncé's performance at the UN General Assembly for World Humanitarian Day 2012, designers Kenzo Digital and <a href="http...
The Creators Project
10.19.12
Music

CMJ Bullshit - Pendu Sound Recordings Showcase
One of the first things I thought about this morning was how I for sure put my face right in front of Chris from Black Marble's face after they were done playing, and rambled off a monologue of awkward nonsense. Maybe he won't remember. Or I could just...
Kelly McClure
10.19.12
News

The Greeks Just Won't Stop Fighting and I'm Bored
Yesterday saw yet another national strike in Greece, like so many before it. Thousands of people gathered in Syntagma Square to protest a bunch of new austerity measures, Molotov cocktails were thrown in the air, and a man died. I know that should make...
Elektra Kotsoni
10.19.12
The Raised Up Right Issue

Shiva’s Wedding
We’d been in India for a month, and it looked like the wedding wasn't going to happen. The last two times I’d been married my brides had been enthusiastic—they were insistent, even. Now I was getting married for a third time to a woman who didn’t want...
Amie Barrodale
Amie Barrodale and Clancy Martin
10.19.12
Music

Pimp Rap Has a New Prince and His Name Is 100s
We haven't seen an MC lay his mack down like 100s did on 'Ice Cold Perm,' his superb debut mixtape, since Snoop's last name was Dogg and Too $hort was spitting "Freaky Tales." It's crazy that he's only 19, half-Jewish, and recently escaped out of a...
Wilbert L. Cooper
10.19.12
Clive Martin's Human Zoo

Are Hipsters Now Free to Walk Our Streets?
No one seems to hate them any more.
Clive Martin
10.19.12
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