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Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

We’ve had about ten guys in the DON’Ts recently for mixing Chucks with ties and ending up with “child actor at awards show.”
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

I was sad because I had no shoes, then I saw a guy who had folded two pot-leaf-emblazoned pieces of attic insulation over his feet and tied them with Scotch tape and I was like, “Wait, what the fuck is going on with that guy?”
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

We were going to slap her when we got home because Grammy and Grampy’s closet is strictly off-limits.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Oh jeez, will you look at that. You mis-matched your chinchillan clog-toppers again.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

It would be cool if we had this DO announcer lady that would go to your door and tell you when you made it and the people would be all, “Are you serious? We’re in?”
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Whoever is at the bottom of this cliff is about to be crushed by a jazzalanche.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

This guy reeks of good vibes like his ass just farted my favorite song.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

You'd think after the first few tries she'd figure out to take off the heels.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Um, why are we at war with these people again?
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Oh good, it looks like the direct ferry service from the Island of Dr. Moreau to central Paris is up and running again. That’s a relief.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Pedal pushers, bobby socks, and those fold-up bikes you can fit in your hallway are fucking lame until some ex-architect with a penchant for violence gives so little of a shit what I think I have to rethink the whole thing.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

Slice of Sneaker Dos and Don'ts

She looks like an undiscovered species of lemur.
VICE Staff
8.3.12
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