Jordan Foisy VICE

Features

The Guilt of the Oldest Brother

I couldn’t protect my brothers from my dad, so what good was I?
Jordan Foisy
2.1.17
guide

What Your Favourite Christmas Song Says About You

There is no genre of music worse than Christmas music. Here's an objectively correct list of what your favourite shitty song says about your shitty self.
Jordan Foisy
12.18.16
Stuff

What Happened When I Used an App to Try to Cure My Premature Ejaculation Issues

Yes, I gamified all my shameful orgasms.
Jordan Foisy
12.6.16
column

Careful, Canada. Justin Trudeau Might Be ‘She’s All That’-ing Us

Bear with me, this analogy works.
Jordan Foisy
11.10.16
Culture

What I Learned From Watching Eight Hours of Steven Seagal Movies

What does the 90s' mumbling, fourth-rate action star say about America and me?
Jordan Foisy
10.25.16
Culture

​An Evening at the Ponies

Is there any fear and loathing left in gambling on horseracing?
Jordan Foisy
10.5.16
column

The Harsh Reality of Being Broke

Here's a brief list of things that I'm finding impossible right now: looking good, having sex, maintaining friendships, having a decent self-esteem, having hope for the future.
Jordan Foisy
8.18.16
Stuff

​Comedians Tell Us What They Think of a Quebec Comic’s Fine for Joking About a Kid With a Disability

Mike Ward's $42,000 fine has become a cause celebre for many Canadian comics but was his joke defensible?
Jordan Foisy
7.27.16
Stuff

A Celebration of Daddys: My Life in Father Figures

When your real dad is a volatile drug addict, you start looking to Homer Simpson and your landlord for fatherly advice.
Jordan Foisy
7.4.16
Culture

What Your Favourite Karaoke Song Says About You

Read this story to learn the one surefire song to get you laid.
Jordan Foisy
6.14.16
column

​I Have a First Nations Background and Didn't Think Kimmy Schmidt Was Racist

Does this make me a bad person, a secret racist, or something even worse?
Jordan Foisy
5.4.16
tech

What I’ve Learned from Still Using a Flip Phone in 2016

For starters, Facebook notifications are a lot more thrilling when you actually have to sit down at a computer.
Jordan Foisy
4.13.16
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