The Noisey Advent Calendar
Big Freedia Proves That "Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer" Can, In Fact, Bang
On "Rudy, the Big Booty Reindeer," the Queen of Bounce replaces Rudolph's bright red nose with "a very large behind," proving once and for all that Paul F. Tompkins is wrong.
Alex Robert Ross
NFL Plans to Circulate Video Clarifying What Sexually Suggestive Acts Are Penalties. We Obviously Need this Video ASAP.
Please, please let there be video of NFL officials twerking. Please.
Here Are 11 Absolutely Terrible Thanksgiving Club Flyers
Tryptophan and clubbing don't mix.
Young People in Russia Explain What They Think of All the Stuff Getting Banned in the Country
"I'm completely against cultural isolation. Unfortunately, Russia is making a beeline for that at the moment."
Objectively Correct Lists
The 13 Most Epically Hilarious Halloween Costumes of 2014
OMFG these costumes are our everything.
We Spoke to the Ass Expert Behind AssMatrix.com
What if we told you there was a collective of people all over the world held together by the love of the posterior? Well, it's called AssMatrix.com. And we talked to the beautiful nerds behind it.
Vermont High School Cancels Homecoming Dance and Blames Miley Cyrus and Her Dang Twerking
When twerking is outlawed, only outlaws will twerk.
The week in GIFS
DMX Screamed Like an Insane Person While Riding a Roller Coaster
Video footage of DMX losing his fucking mind on a roller coaster is all over the internet this week. He screams profanities while riding the Sling Shot in Orlando, Florida, then pretends like he was never scared at all. Nice try, dude.
We Partied with DJ Paul and the Stripper Who Gave the Lap Band Dance at the Gathering of the Juggalos
The breakout star of the Gathering of the Juggalos was Ratchet Regi, a stripper who twerked on a 500-pound man's belly in front of Da Mafia 6ix's DJ Paul at an outdoor strip club.
Atlanta: Strip City
With unique access to three of the city's most notorious strip clubs, their best-known dancers, management, and loyal customers, Atlanta: Strip City explores what it's really like to get naked and dance for money in the strip club capital of the...
Joanna Fuertes Knight
The Twerking Thief Strikes in Brooklyn
Just when you thought the whole twerking trend couldn't get more ridiculous, a surveillance camera caught a woman twerking outside an apartment building mere moments before she and a man stole the contents of two packages from the building.
we saw this
A Look Inside the Twerking Championships
Spoiler: Lotsa ass.