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Why Uni Lad Is Bigger than a Rape Joke

In the rush to condemn Uni Lad's rape banter, we all risk missing out on their other jokes - and that would be the real rape.

by Alex Miller
02 February 2012, 1:00pm


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UniLad.com, if you don't know, is a site run by and for male students around the country full of advice about football and sex. It's like Loaded, but without a legal department. Over the last few days everyone's been getting in a right old state about an article on UniLad.com which encouraged men to rape women. As such, the internet is currently in the middle of an ethical debate – is it right to encourage male students to think raping women is funny?

God knows there are great arguments on both side. For example, the Quietus makes a good case against the trivialisation of rape, here, while this guy makes a compelling argument in favour of Uni Lad's unique brand of boundary-pushing, in-your-face misogyny.

But the real issue is being missed here. There's a genuine threat that the furore surrounding one controversial article is going to distract Britain from the rest of Uni Lad's content. And that would be the real rape. 

Here are the ten best Uni Lad jokes. Proof that we can all look beyond a bit of rape-related quibbling, and see some great bloody banter!

10. The Uni Lad Office Joke

Few other websites would have the balls to throw away a zinger like this on social media. Big balls guys, you've got big balls.

9. The 'Would You Fuck The Queen?' Joke

But would you, mate? Imagine, you'd be a national leg-end!

8. The Number One Break-Up Line Of All Time Joke

Imagine if you said that, mate. She'd be so upset!

7. The Downfall YouTube Joke

By just replacing the subtitles on this classic scene, the Uni Lads managed to make it look like Hitler was really upset about his girlfriend going to a nightclub he'd planned on going to that night. Brilliant. That the joke doesn't work if you're German only makes it more delicious. Hitler? What a lad.

6. The 'Keep Calm And Sit On My Face' Joke

That is not what that sign originally said!

5. The 'Like Us Or We Will Mock You Mercilessly' Joke

They probably bloody would as well. They'd make you look like a right tossbag! Like? More like LOVE, mate!

4. The Men Think About Sex A Lot Joke

Admit it, it's bloody true! Centuries of human civilisation and progress have all been a ruse to hide the fact that, deep down, we're all just bloody hopeless rape machines!

3. The 'Twilight Is Shit' Joke

Is it just me, or do girls LOVE Twilight, but actually it's shit?! No, it's not just me, Uni Lad noticed as well! They even noticed that you could probably learn a thing or two about pulling birds from that Cullen idiot. Girls like the moody type, they point out, and IT'S SO TRUE. So just act all Kurt and you'll be knee-deep in fresher before you know it! But be careful mate, you might bite off more than you can chew!

Just make sure you don’t get too into it if they really are fifteen because these days, peadophilia seems to be a lot more unacceptable than a bit of kinky vampire murder-sex. And there are probably a lot of over-eighteen kinky sluts who’ll let an Edward Cullen-look-a-like do a lot dirtier things to them than fifteen-year-old Sally who just learnt to read, stuffs her bra, and hasn’t got her period yet.

LULZ!

2. The Tagline Joke

These guys have so many jokes, they've even had to stuff a piece of perfect observational comedy in the website's banner! And it's true mate, libraries are really boring ;)

1. The Apology Joke

Yeah right. Like these bantalopes are actually sorry. They just know that some moaning wenches aren't gonna leave them alone for ages unless it seems like they're sorry. Classic manoeuvre, lads! Pretend to be all sensitive to impress the girls, and then bloody well shag 'em!

You can tell that it's not sincere by looking at the Twitter page of one of their main contributors, Chef Jake.

See, totally doesn't give a shit about the rape joke or think it's reprehensible in any way! He just thinks it's all banter! Banter about rape! Rape banter! What! A! LAD! Let's all go and rape him!

Follow Alex on Twitter

PS: I did try approaching Uni Lad for an interview. After a few texts back and forth, we agreed I'd email some questions over, but I haven't heard back yet. 

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