Going Out with a DJ is Sick, Actually

You might have seen the article we posted yesterday which suggested that going out with a DJ is about as enjoyable as spending a wet weekend in Wrexham. Apparently, dating someone who happens to make a living from playing records to strangers is basically a nightmarishly unending round of nights spent stood about like a lemon, playing gooseberry with your bae, as wave after wave of flirty onlookers clamour for a personal 'after-party'.

It can't be that bad, surely, we reasoned? What about the free drinks and the paid-for Ubers and the never having to spend half an hour in the pissing rain trying to get into a club? There had to be some positives, right? In the interest of fairness, we spoke to a few people who happen to go out with DJs about what it's actually like to be someone who just happens to go out with a DJ. It turns out that, actually, they think it's quite fun. Which isn't to say that Yasmin Kühn is wrong of course, but given that we live in an age of unceasing discourse, it'd be a bit churlish to assume that she's 100% right.

The people we spoke to asked to remain anonymous and politely requested that the names of their partners remained under wraps too.

THUMP: What's good about going out with a DJ?
Girlfriend #1: We get to travel together and go on adventures, seeing new places, staying in nice hotels, meeting interesting people, going to festivals. It's great. And I really, really like hotels.

Girlfriend #2: I didn't meet my boyfriend through music and I run my own business so I don't travel with him all that much and I will never be seen on stage behind him either, so I'm not the most pro 'being a DJ's girlfriend' girlfriend but, you have a totally driven boyfriend who works his arse off and is constantly creating, whether it's in the studio or behind the decks. You go out with some well travelled and worldly, who has a lot to say and always comes home from being on the road with stories and new things to talk about so it never EVER gets boring.

I mean, yeah, he's always away but sometimes I get to travel with him and see the world in a totally different, non-touristy light. You meet locals, eat like they do and party with them - which can be ridiculously fun. Even if, like me, you don't drink and you're not the hugest music fan.

And, yeah, you spend extended periods of time apart when he's on the road. The thing is though, imagine sitting in every weekend with the same person, doing the same mundane shit, joylessly traipsing round the same boring museums… a DJ's girlfriend's life is the polar opposite of that. She gets to do whatever she wants when he's away and when he's home, you spend much needed time together which is always exciting and never becomes dull. It's the perfect mix. It's blatantly obvious that your boyfriend doesn't do a 9-5, however his work makes him super happy and that, in turn, makes you both really happy = HAPPY PEOPLE IN A HAPPY RELATIONSHIP WHICH DEFINITELY DOESN'T SUCK.

What's the best night you've had out as a result of your partner's line of work?
Girlfriend #1: Nights where there is a whole crew of us. We've grown up together and have the same group of core friends so it's nice to be able to all go out together. If I'm honest some of the best nights were years ago in Cable when this was all kind of new to the pair of us and there were about 30 of us who would go out en masse. We would all travel up together and still be walking round South Bank the next morning. Obviously now things are a little different so it's nice to be able to go with friends to bigger and better nights. Also, I don't want to sound like a dick but also deciding to go to nights last minute when they are sold out. Having that freedom is nice! Guest list is a saviour.

Girlfriend #2: New Year's Eve 2013/2014 was amazing. Three shows in the UK, in one night. All the trains and cars, all the promoters and drinks, all the fans and sweaty gurning chicks and various back rooms with silly antics happening. That New Year's Eve lasted around 27 hours and was the polar opposite of any anticlimactic NYE I've ever had before.

Do you ever wish he worked in a call centre?
Girlfriend #1: Never, nor would I ever want him to do anything else. When he is playing and making music he is at his happiest, he is complete. We work in reasonably similar areas which is pretty lucky. I love what I do and would never expect or let anyone take that away from me, so would never wish that on him.

Girlfriend #2: He wouldn't be happy in his day to day life doing anything but making and playing music. He loves what he does and that's what makes him and in turn, us, both happy in our relationship. The hours he works (in the studio and in the clubs/on the road) are antisocial but I don't think I'd have it any other way - our relationship wouldn't be the same otherwise, would it? It's all I know when it comes to dating him so I'm happy he does what he does.

I work really long hours running my business, sometimes my work is what gets in the way of us seeing one another, sometimes he has to deal with me going to events or parties which have no connection to him or his music and he's totally cool with it, so why shouldn't I be? He doesn't ask me to take time out from my job to see him, so I would never do the same to him. He doesn't get jealous or touchy when I work alongside guys in an office so why should I care about the girls who are at the club?

I think people need to look past the fact that they assume every single girl dating a DJ is with them because of who they are, not what they are and also they need to see past the difficult things which come along with dating someone who has chosen that path in life. Yes some probably are with their man for the wrong reasons, but that won't last, they'll soon get bored. Being with a DJ is what you make it. In my case, I'm dating a guy who happens to create and play music for a living. I'm in it for all the reasons which are right for me, and I couldn't be happier with his lifestyle and his work ethic.

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