In the most heartwarming viral video to come out of the five boroughs since a rat was caught on video attempting to drag a pizza slice down some subway stairs, a white man got into a one-sided street altercation with some other white people and claimed to have "settled" the neighborhood for them before shouting "white privilege! White fucking privilege!"
Thankfully, Queens man Luis Solares—who was working at the construction site across the street from the caucasian volcano of rage—followed the NYPD dictum "if you see something take out your smartphone and start filming" and now the entire internet can enjoy the video of the guy Solares dubbed the "Christopher Columbus of Brooklyn." The whole video is, like any great work of art, worth viewing in full, but here are some choice excerpts from the upset pale man's rant—which, it should be noted, occurred while a cop was standing between him and the target of his rage:
"Don't fucking come at me dude, I'll kill you—with one punch!"
"You're messing with the wrong guy! I fight for a living!"
"You push your stroller into people—your baby could get hurt! Your baby could get hurt!"
"I fight babies like you... baby!"
"The only reason white people like you are living here is because I settled this fucking neighborhood for you!"
"Fuck you, white trash!"
The neighborhood in question, by the way, is mostly office buildings and condos these days—Downtown Brooklyn gentrified a long time ago. And though people have been "discovering" the borough since a few Dutch settlers built the village of Breuckelen, it takes a world-class asshole to actually claim, out loud, that he made the neighborhood safer for other white people.
As of press time, no one appeared to know the identity of this mysterious porcelain fountain of fury, but he's probably not having a very good day, wherever he is.