Angry Muslim Fascists vs Angry White Nazis
The run up to this year's Remembrance Day has been one of the most turbulent with the row over "poppy fascism" and Celtic fans pissing on the parade. Of course, Anjem Choudary wasn't going to miss out.
Choudary's new group, Muslims Against the Crusades decided to protest during the nationwide two minute silence, burning a poppy wreath and holding placards saying: "British Soldiers Burn in Hell". I knew there would be a great vibe, so I went down to join in.
At around 10.15, 30 or so members of Muslims Against the Crusades turned up with their banners. Old favourites, the EDL turned up to great them. This was going to be a battle of who could be the most far-right group of the day.
Guess which group these guys are with...
Yep, you guessed it the English Defence League were back in London to counter protest and did their utmost to come up with the most offensive remarks possible. "PISS BE UPON MOHAMMED" and the old favourite "ALLAH IS A PAEDO".
First blood went to the EDL as some latecomers ran past the MAC cordon and threw some ham at them. Which is not only very offensive to Muslims, but also a very British type of hate-crime.
As the clock struck 11.00 the EDL fell silent to honour the people who died in war. The MAC didn't exactly do the same.
Instead they set fire to a poppy wreath and continually chanted "BRITISH SOLDIERS BURN IN HELL!" for the whole two minutes. That's one-all.
Not content with only getting arrested once a month, EDL leader Tommy Robinson (that's him up there) ran over to the MAC, jumped inside their cordon and tried to take down one of their flags. He was then arrested and dragged into a police van. In all fairness, it was a pretty impressive jump. EDL 2 - 1 MAC
I'm thinking of making an EDL calendar and selling the idea to their merch department. This guy has June written all over him.
Out of nowhere the police sent in a snatch squad to apprehend one of the MAC. The EDL guys cheered - it was all a little bit Punch and Judy. EDL 3-1 MAC.
You have to hand it to young angry extremist Muslims, they look amazing. It's like an International Noise Conspiracy video. 3-2.
The suspect was carried away for what looks like a cavity search. 4-2.
But Hamas are sooooo gay!
Is there a website where people fetishise Islamic extremists? There should be, this guy's a rebel with a cause. EDL 4-3 MAC.
The police had finally had enough of the crazy extremists so they decided to escort them to South Kensington tube station, confusing a lot of tourists visiting the V&A.
Final score: EDL 4 - 3 MAC.
So the EDL won on points, but frankly, no-one gives a shit about them and their marginal white bullshit. The MAC are making waves, they're the future.
- Vice Blog