If you haven't been keeping up with the MUNCHIES Guide to British Food, One: How is microwave rice these days? And Two: You might want to change into some looser trousers, you're about eight courses, a dessert platter, and several post-dinner brandies behind.
Of course, we couldn't embark on an exploration of food in Britain without a shout out to the old favourites: tea, fish and chips, pork scratchings, and that weird thing we have about crisp sandwiches.
Alongside these big names, MUNCHIES also explored the lesser known areas of British eating, including the dumpling paradise hiding in Croydon, a Hindu temple near Wembley Stadium with a mean veggie curry, and Manchester's favourite Thai restaurant, which serves badass papaya salad from inside a Chinese supermarket.
Outside England, we had Marina O'Loughlin on why Scottish restaurants make her cringe and in the MUNCHIES Guide to Wales, we ate cawl, Welsh cakes, and Wushi—a.k.a. Welsh sushi with host Charlet Duboc. Over in Northern Ireland, we discovered Yellowman fairground sweets (and promptly threw up on the waltzers) and all the way from the VICE garden in New York, cheffing legend Margot Henderson whipped up a traditional crab salad.
Oh, and we hung with some of the most recognisable names in British food: photographer Martin Parr, River Café co-founder Ruth Rogers, Chinese cooking legend Ken Hom, baking bae Ruby Tandoh, and cheeky chappy extraordinaire Jamie Oliver. But y'know, nbd.
In true British dining style, we marked the end of the week with a curry (don't even think about asking for chips) and a pint poured by a pub landlady who probably knows Pete Doherty better than his own mother.
Still hungry? We could stop for a kebab on the way home …
View the entire MUNCHIES Guide to British Food here.