This is one of those things that can only happen in the crazy, obsessive world of football media. Raheem Sterling, in an interview with the Manchester Evening News, was forced to utter the sentence "my stomach was rumbling and I had diarrhoea."
Sterling, who recently joined Man City for £49 million, had to fill us in on his regularity because the speculation was that he tried to force Liverpool to sell him to City by skipping out on a couple of training sessions earlier this month. We need to know why he's not out there! The crowds demand. I was shitting! came the response.
"I was in training on the Tuesday – in the changing room my stomach started hurting. I still went out and trained though. "That day I went home, and I told the doc I was ill. My stomach was rumbling and I had diarrhoea. The doctor just said to me you can't be around the other players. For the next 48 hours, I stayed at home. That's what the club doctor told me to do. When that 48 hours was done I came back to training as normal."
It was a bitter end for Sterling and Liverpool, but if the club doctor told Sterling not to come in for two days, and the team just let him twist in the wind as everyone killed him for a supposed power play, well then that's shitty, too. Made even more shitty now that he's had to come out and give the reason why he was sick and forced to miss training. Yes, yes, I used the colloquialism "shitty" in a post about diarrhoea. Pun intended, assholes*.